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Hi Everyone

Hello I am excited to be here.  I am here looking for support and feedback.  

Just a summary of my situation. I moved across my entire country and moved somewhere I can’t speak the language (not so smart) to be with my long distance boyfriend.  We have been through a lot of issues since my move over 3 years ago.  I won’t get into those at this point as I don’t want to write a novel.

Our big issue at this point is poor communication and we have major core wounds from our past.  This causes both of us to react poorly and fight.  Also we both are codependent.  I think that especially I will need help to navigate.  At this time only I am willing to seek therapy.

I am happy to be here and get to know some of you!!

Any strategies to break the codependent cycle would be appreciated.  I find it hard to know if I am enabling or just loving.

3
User Profile: Heather225
Heather225 January 7th

@EnglishinaFrenchplace

hi there, just swinging by to welcome you to Cups and give this post a bump!

if you ever have questions about the platform, i am a PM away!

2 replies
User Profile: EnglishinaFrenchplace
EnglishinaFrenchplace OP January 11th

@Heather225 Thank you!! I was feeling a bit sad no one replied to me.

To update the situation, we have found that taking a step back from the relationship really helps. We need to really analyze the motivations behind our actions.  Also learning to stop feeling responsible for the other person’s emotions is helping a lot.  We are having much better communication now.

1 reply
User Profile: Heather225
Heather225 January 13th

@EnglishinaFrenchplace

aaaa i am so happy to hear there's been progress!

and that's a HUGE lesson to have learned in not taking responsibility for others' emotions. proud of you and wishing you the best <3 

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