My partner gave me an STD - my world is crashing down.
Hello fellow people! Im coming on here because I really need someone to relate or at least listen to what is happening right now, if anyone is available. I would really appreciate that because my world is crashing down at the moment. Yesterday my partner got tested and has been tested positive for chlamydia. We‘re an LGBTQ couple, so two women, which means the risk of me having it is very small. However, I am still entitled to medication and will take it. Before she met me, she slept around with many guys and girls without protection. I didn’t know she had unsafe sex, I just knew she had a lot of experience. Turns out, she catched the STD from a fellow guy in the past. I know that she could not know that she had the STD, however, I got tested before our relationship and actually had hoped she would be responsible enough to think about her potential risk, which she didn’t. Now I have to take the medication, and the issue here is, is that it’s very bad for people with stomach issues. I have a chronic illness, which means it’s putting my health at a severe risk. I know I’m in no place to be mad at her and that it is partly my fault for being in a sexual relationship with her, however, this is affecting the way I feel about her severely. I feel like my trust has been broken. Has anyone else experienced this or any thoughts to share? I would appreciate any words. Thanks for reading and have a great day <3
I'm very sorry to hear that. In my opinion it's very irresponsible to not get tested before starting a sexual relationship, but I think you didn't thought it was necessary for her since you didn't knew she had unsafe sex. But I also think that it's boths responsibility to check. There were times when I forgot to take my pill, so my boyfriend got really angry with me, we came to the compromise that he'll remind me as well, since it's boths responsibility to have safe and protected sex. You could've asked her about her sex life before and asked her to get tested. But you shouldn't think about the things you and her could've done to prevent that, that would just make people mad. It happened now, all you can do now is maybe take a break, it is shocking news you need to deal with right now, so having her around might not be the best idea. Especially since you think differently from her now. I think you need a little time for yourself now and then you two can have a talk about how it'll be in the future, since you feel like you've been betrayed and probably feel like you don't know your partner as good as you thought. In my experience I ask every person I sleep with beforehand how their sexual relationship were and if it was protected or not.
