So I met a girl...
We've gone out on a couple of dates and we get along great, have similar interests, blah blah all the feel good stuff. We have a strong mutual physical attraction and she wants to move things further along but I just don't feel ready. I had a pretty bad breakup almost 2 months ago and I'm just feeling traumatized and unsure of myself. I probably shouldn't have even gone out with this girl but she was pretty aggressive in pursuing me. Now I find myself enjoying her company, wanting her physically, but still too emotionally raw to trust myself or her with progressing in the relationship.
Not sure if I should just end things and let her be free to pursue other men, or keep on being stagnant in the relationship until I get myself sorted out.
@funnyVillage1676 you need to talk to her sit her down and say its going too fast cab we slow it down and we'll talk abt it in a few weeks
hi, imho, her being too aggressive is not necessarily a good thing or does it even signify a real interest in you or your needs. I would pull back and see if she notices, and see how she reacts to that. I don't know that telling her will really solve anything as that would only give her more information to manipulate the situation in her favor. However, if you are not comfortable, you do have to let her know or just break it off or think about how it would make you feel if you did. It does not sound like you are ready or want just a physical thing with her either, and which I don't blame you for
good luck...
Have you told her where you are in this regard? Maybe she will slow things a bit and give you more time if she understands. And if not, you will know where you stand.
It's only been a few dates so she might actually be throwing a big red flag up anyway and slowing things down is a good filter in such situations.
I take all new friendships slowly because I have found dangerous, abusive, and difficult people often try to enmeshed others and love bomb them to get them to override their instincts about things.
I wound up telling her I'm not ready for something sexual, she seemed to understand. I'll keep taking it slow and see how she responds. She's still very eager lol but it does trigger my spidey senses so to speak. Basically I get the feeling she's going to go along with whatever I say to keep me near.
Thank you all for your advice, it all helps.
