My partner is not sharing his thoughts or anything.
My partner always hesitate to share his thoughts or his beliefs. He told me that he tried to tell me but I did not give him satisfactory answer what he wanted to hear. So he stops sharing his vulnerability and his other side which is full of stress. I think he underestimated me , he is always welcome answers what he wants to hear . I talked to about his behaviour and told him to share his thoughts but he never listen. At the other end I always share every single detailed with him . I do not feel welcome in his life . It's painful.
@lovingLemon8999
it is sad when your partner doesn't feel comfy enough to be vulnerable and share about his day or stress or life in general that may make you feel more welcome in his life and more important part that he lets you in and trusts you enough to do so
maybe you can ask him what could help him feel more comfortable to open up? sometimes people just aren't used to sharing things.. or may need more time.. and assurance...i don't mean to generalise but it's a little common for men to not be so vulnerable about their problems... but as a partner.. we can try assuring them repeatedly that they don't need to wear any masks around us and can be emotionally safe to share whatever they want to 🤗
Thank you so much for your support.
I try to convince him for almost 1 year but he is not opening up about his stress, it's frustrating.
💕💕 @lovingLemon8999 does he share why not? and if he wants you to be in his life as a supportive partner? how it makes you feel when he is being closed off and how you both can work through this?
He told me that I have not answers of his questions. I am not giving him satisfactory answer. I think he is kind of self person who don't want to share things.but as a partner I feel very bad.
@lovingLemon8999
It is frustrating when we share yet get nothing in return .... if he shared how would he know that you do not have insight... sometimes we do not have answers but a piece of the puzzle that helps them in their journey.
If he wants only certain answers then he is not sharing for the right reasons but does not want anyone to question his view on things and that is NOT partner material.
Yea it's driving me crazy. I confront him so many times but nothing changed. He just don't care .
@lovingLemon8999
Satisfactory answers equals just what he wants to hear .....? that is not a conversation but an echo.
perhaps he should go yell into a canyon
@lovingLemon8999
It hurts to listen that the partner doesn't share information even though usually do? But it does bring some questions to mind.
1. How close you are to share everything with each other.
2. How often do both of you info on each other unconsciously, when you fight.
3. What type of information you want to know and what info are you giving, is it casual stuff related to work or something specific or a specific topic.
There are other questions but I will hold them on for now.
Plus if you want other person to share a info on specific topic, it's ideal to give info of equal value to other person
I share ever single details with him because we are in long distance relationship, when I ask him where have he been then he'll answer like we were outside or for work . He never specified his daily routine. It's bother me .
@lovingLemon8999
Isn't that enough details, ok if you do not get answers by your partner way of talking. Did you ask further questions as whatyou want to know. Also, I am a little curious as to why couple share info
1. Cause you want to OR
2. Its a tradition to do so OR
3. To get rid of buit up stress throughout the day OR
4. To get rid of void in heart by talking to someone close.
@lovingLemon8999 Hello. It is sad to hear how bad you may feel about not getting a good emotional connection with your partner.
I believe two of the sentences you wrote may be summary of the entire problem: "I am not giving him satisfactory answer" and (for me this one sounds particularly painful) "I do not feel welcome in his life".
I've never though about being with someone for "getting satisfactory answers". I'd rather thought about "joys together are doubled, worries together are halved" scenario. Just sharing our days... Maybe not every minute of them, but feelings, reflections, most important events...
If you would have to choose between several solutions, like: trying to get "satisfactory" answers (and learning what answer can be regarded as such, first), trying to change your partner, or trying to re-evaluate what you expect from a relationship - which one would would sound the most reasonable for you? Or maybe you have some other ideas?