I'm totally lost in my confusing feelings

@GenerousEyes22

Hii there. I feel for you with how heavy you must be feeling after ending that 8-year relationship. Making that decision is a brave and difficult decision, especially I see that you both care about each other.

It's understandable that despite the unhealthy behaviors, it's going to be hard to accept the bond and love you shared is over.

And your feelings of fear and hesitancy are completely valid. It's natural to be cautious when you're deciding if you want to try the relationship with him again.

It's clear to me you've put a lot of thought into your decision to end it, recognizing the unhealthy patterns and acknowledging the pain it caused.

As difficult as it is, taking this step shows your strength and self-awareness. It's okay to grive the loss of relationship, even if it was the right decision. Give yourself the time and space you need to heal.

Breakups are never easy, but please know you don't have to face it alone. You got a whole community here who got your back.

Feel free to share more of your feelings and thoughts, we got ya.

And remember, it's okay to prioritize your own happiness and piece of mind.

Best wishes to you 💜

Thank you for taking the time to read me and comment.

I honestly didn't expect to receive such a thoughtful answer, it was very nice of you.

I had tears crossing my face while reading it because I felt you got exactly te feeling.

Thank you again.

I think you are right, it is hard to walk away someone very caring that did nothing to hurt you.

I don't know if I'm just convincing myself but I think we need some distance. After 8 years I don't know anymore which are my needs and which are the couple needs.

I need some alone time, solve my unhealthy behaviours and if he will do too we might try again, but not now. Even if it feels like my chest is constantly burning.

Thank you again for the care 🙏

@GenerousEyes22

so you both might want to try to work at it ......but you are scared it will be the same... 

I can understand that as sometimes we fall into something we feel semi comfortable with and it often has similar results but it does not have to.   

The difference in relationships and you will find the longer it goes the more it happens ... people are growing and changing  often in couples not at same times or speed  yet we sometimes hold person in the idea we had of them before.

If you both have done some reflection since breakup you may respond differently and may be able to work on better strategy and vision of what you want ........

the biggest killer or partnerships is not speaking up and settling for what you think the other person wants..