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I got emotionally cheated on

sweetcake0707 January 29th
.

Hi there, it would be nice if anyone would give me some advice and reassurance

I recently found out that my bf emotionally cheated on me with another close friend(female).. they both were close to each other as they are in the same class and see each other almost every day whereas I meet him only during the lunch break, as a result he started sharing every other thing with her.. even our relationship issues.. which I think should've been addressed to me first.. I'm ur gf shouldn't I be ur first priority? I get tht theyre best friends but.. I'm ur gf and ur having an issue with me so the solution also lies with me, not her.. I feel so dejected and hopeless.. he absolutely broke my trust, I hv informed him about this and he accepts his mistake however upon asking him abt how he's going to fix his mistake he says he doesn't know..

I reason I'm so heart broken is because I read through their texts and found out about this.. if I hadn't then he probably wouldn't ever tell me.. this friend tht he would confide in had informed me earlier about certain issues that he would complain about and would also warn me that I should never let my bf know as in my bfs words "whatever they were discussing was supposed to be kept between them", he says he approached her because they spent most of the time together and also because he didn't want to hurt me.. but I'd rather get hurt by his words than anyone else.. he has complained about a lot of things to her like how I am satisfied with him, that he thinks tht I do not appreciate him enough, that I enjoy flirting with other guys to make his jealous, he also complained that I avoid physical contact even when there's no trs around and that this frustrates him which then lead to this friend lashing out on me and taunting me (I get scared to even hold hands in school since I hv strict parents and I don't want anyone complaining)... this hurts so bad.. its like they have no respect for me.. the way he would talk about me in those texts .. its not good.. what do I do? Should I break up? But I love him..

1
toughTiger6481 January 29th
.

@sweetcake070

In a way the sharing and talking with someone else is hurtful and you reading texts may have been a surprise to you. Not sure if you just found out perhaps reading on his phone with / or without his permission.   

IF he thought he could confide in you he might have... for anyone i knew that shared with someone other then their partner it was often because if they tried to talk their partner was not receptive OR what is worse not listening...... There is a big difference between hearing something and really listening to what someone is trying to share. 

How do you react .......is be open to his talking to you ... to be open to the discussing the things he spoke of with her.... If you take the defensive and try to argue it .......then it will not work out..... sometimes that is hard to do....... as we may not agree how others see us or take something we do differently then how we expect them to.....