I don't know what to do anymore

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years.

We have had many issues and often would argue, break up and make up again.

I know this is very toxic. We both are trying to fix it but he hasn't been prioritising me. 1 of the 1st major break ups was for 2 months and it was because of me feeling like I am not a priority. Now almost ¾ of a year later it is back again. I can't go in depth about how many different scenarios but let me use the most recent 1. We broke up recently due to the issues and him not priorities anything. So I of course get upset and well he told me to postpone it due to me have major school exams upcoming. So we did and the school stuff thankfully passed pleasantly. He kept insisting on talking things out and not breaking up for good so I eventually listened. But I wanted a formal proposal to be together again. He kept making it into a joke which I found upsetting. Then I decided to take it into my own hands and ask. He made it into a joke too even though I told him about it. I of course got upset followed by him getting upset saying that I started treated him badly and like a friend. Followed by me saying we aren't together. I hate that he took the break up for granted and he still is. But then again can I give him wrong due to our past history. I thought by asking for a formal beginning to our relationship it would bring some sense of seriousness into the relationship, but no. Just jokes.

When I wanted to talk about it right away he said he couldn't because he was too mad and wanted an apology. How I was treating him differently in and belittling him and treating him as a pet. He saw it as disrespectful so I apologised for him thinking it that way and told him I didn't mean for it to come across that way. He was still upset and needed an hour to cool off. The hour arrives. He isn't even on time to talk about it. When he comes back he doesn't even tell me what happened, where he was or why he was late. I asked and only then he said he was playing a game. And it accidentally went over the time. I felt upset that he didn't tell me anything and allowed himself to play another game without watching the time. I was gaming too. But I made sure to be on time. He went in to say I would not understand and how I play games for fun and he is serious about it. Earlier the same day he left me alone to game, all because his aim was bad and he no longer wanted to game. What happen to spending time with your gf....isn't that still fun? He said not gaming. Unless he is winning it's not fun...to which I got upset because I genuinely like doing anything with him and I forced myself to play a game I don't even like as much anymore just to be with him.

He then after saying little to nothing said he had to go play football and someone was coming to pick him up. I complained to him about how he asked for time off just to leave after saying little to nothing. Asked him if he could stay just today. He said no because the person was coming. I was mad but what could I do.

More than an hour passed. My anxiety wouldn't go away. My body was tired but I simply couldn't sleep. So I waited on him. He came home messaged me and went straight to him game.

He completely made no attempt to talk about our issues. I brought it up, obviously upset and complaining how I am never a priority. Whether it is spending time with me or dealing with our issues I never feel like a priority. He just apologised and said he is wrong. He then said can we talk about it tomorrow to which I said that I was waiting for so long and he asked for time just to never be ready to talk. Why wait for tomorrow just for something else to come up?

Asked if something happened. And only then he explains that at football a guy and him were insulting each other but in a kinda "roasting" way and before the guy left he hit him on the head then ran away. My boyfriend came home upset due to that. But how was I expected to know that? I asked him how was I expected to know and where was the communication and he said he didn't tell me because I was feeling worse than him. But does it matter if I was feeling worse when I am not even being held a priority? The he went to bed because he also said all day he was feeling lazy.

Every single time he has an issue it affects our relationship. Every single time he is in a bad mood I put his mood over mine and listen to him 1st. Prioritise him 1st even over my school work. I always manage to make sure he is okay and be there for him.

My anxiety is getting back worse again and I don't know what to do. I love him but what more can I do if he simply won't put me 1st. Must I beg a guy who claims to love me to do his duties in the relationship? I don't want to leave. Nor does it make sense calling a break up because that never happens as seen in the past. But what more can I do? I simply don't know what to do.