How to fix my marriage?

@compassionateFriend6011

Welcome to 7 Cups

I am really sorry that you are going through a marriage turmoil. We all know how when the home life can get a little shaky, it can have impacts throughout your world. You are not Alone.

Each relationship experience is unique and personal.
What does that mean? It means that what might work for one relationship doesn’t mean it will work for another.

What we can say, here are some possible things to work with and help within the marriage:

Communications are extremely important. Learn to talk to each other. Compassion
It’s OK to not agree, and show Respect. We are individuals.
Make time for each other, Couples Time [Intimacy, Acceptance, Compassion] it is especially important with children, because children do not always understand boundaries and privacy.
Make time for you (alone time)
Forgiveness, we are humans with personal desires and feelings. Forgive yourself, also don’t forget your Partner is human too.
Appreciation – Show Appreciation to you and also your Partner.

This is just a few things and there is Hope. Keep Hope alive. And in everything, Show Love.

Also, here are some Self-Help guides.
It is also ok to get Marriage Counseling, having a non-biased opinion can be rewarding and helpful for all parties.

You said your son…Is it his son too?

Yea it is his son too.

I am so sorry to hear this. I am in a similar situation where my girlfriend suddenly asked for space and 1 month of minimum communication.it hurts and is bewildering and causes uncertainty. Looking on the positive aspect is that both have been married for 10 years.maybe communicate to him acknowledging your mistake and your genuine effort in improving,like going for marriage therapy or communication classes,etc. Hang in there

Thanks. I’m hanging on. I have come to terms with it. I have owned up to my mistakes and apologized. He just told me he needs some space. Some time apart to cool off. I am just taking it day by day. Cry myself to sleep, wake up crying, but I am trying to still do by my children. As I can do right now until he’s ready to talk.

@compassionateFriend6011

Of course! I'm really sorry to hear about the tough situation you're going through. It's completely understandable to feel worried and upset when facing a rough patch in your marriage, especially with kids involved. Here are some friendly suggestions on how to approach this:

1. Give him the space he needs: Try to understand that sometimes we all need a little breathing room to sort out our thoughts and feelings. Respect his request for some time apart, and in the meantime, take care of yourself and your kids.

2. Focus on self-improvement: Use this time to reflect on how you communicate with each other. We all have areas we can work on, and it's a positive step to grow as individuals and as a couple.

3. Apologize and take responsibility: When the time feels right, have an honest and heartfelt conversation where you apologize for your part in the argument. Taking responsibility shows that you're willing to work towards making things better.

4. Show love and understanding: Let him know how much he means to you and that you genuinely want to work on your marriage together. Express your commitment to making positive changes for the sake of your love and family.

5. Prioritize your children's health: While giving him space, you can still communicate with him about your son's health when necessary. Keep the focus on your child's well-being and try to keep those conversations as friendly and respectful as possible.

6. Seek professional help: Considering couples therapy could be beneficial to work through the issues together and improve your communication. A professional can provide helpful guidance and support during this tough time.

Remember, rebuilding trust and resolving conflicts takes time and effort from both partners. Take it one step at a time and keep showing your love and commitment. You're not alone in this, and I'm here if you need any further support or advice.

Thank you for those insights! I will definitely try these things and pray that it will get better. I know it will probably get better. I just need to try and not think about it so much and give him the space he needs for now. Your advice was very appreciated.

@compassionateFriend6011

I hope it works and things become better 😊

Well, after 3 nights of being apart sleeping in separate rooms, we were able to sleep in our bed together last night. We did talk about what needs to change for this to work with us. He did tell me he still needs some time. We will communicate, just to give him some space like during the day not to text him or call him so he can get his work done and have that time to himself. For the rest of the week. And by the weekend we will talk everything out and go from there. So I think there is progress happening. I just pray that it continues to progress positively and we don’t go back a step.

I let my emotions and stress get in the way of our relationship. I think it’s anxiety, I’m afraid to get on anxiety medication because I don’t like taking medicine. Would this help me with my moods and stress? Could it help me with my relationship with my husband?

@compassionateFriend6011

I can understand how difficult and overwhelming this situation must be for you. Rebuilding a relationship takes time, patience, and effort from both parties.

It's important to respect your husband's request for space. Give him the time and distance he needs to think things through and calm down. Try not to constantly reach out to him; let him come to you when he's ready...

When it comes to your child's health, try to keep your communication with your husband short and to the point (if possible), without bringing up personal or relationship issues. This will help maintain boundaries while still addressing important family matters.

You could also take this time to work on yourself and improve your communication skills. Reflect on what caused the argument and consider seeking therapy or counseling to develop healthier ways of communicating, and show your husband that you're committed to personal growth and positive change.

Thank you. That’s what I am working towards right now. It’s getting better just slowly. I appreciate all the advice I am getting!

Don't do that space thing, pretend that you need him for things related to your children and use it to break the ice, make him feel how much you need him and you can't survive even -space- away🐿️, buy nice gift and may be a letter with your hand writing I think this is romantic

How do I get him to talk to me. He still seems disgusted with me. We have been getting along and being intimate, but he’s still “needing space.” How do I communicate with him about this about wanting to put this behind us and being completely ok with moving on.