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How do you handle a situation where your energy is so drained because of the environment and you display sadness, your sadness is used against you?

futureDeveloper November 7th, 2023

Hi,

I would like to know some ideas on how to cope with a situation where you've been patiently enduring a toxic environment for a long time, but eventually, you can't take it anymore, and you show your sadness and leave to recharge. Then suddenly, you're condemned with statements like, "You're a Christian; you should have compassion."

Any thoughts on this?

11
Barltik2065 November 9th, 2023

@futureDeveloper

Hello futrueDeveloper;

I am sorry you are having to deal with such matters. The dynamics of relations with friends, family and what not can be hard.

People can say things that they truly don't mean they are hurting. We all have said things we are sorry for saying. But then it is easy to say "you are to forgive." When you have been hurt again and again.

It is not easy, you have every right to feel as you do. It is ok to feel that way right now.

Why do you think, they feel you don't have compassion?


Here are some Self-Help guides


Have you talked with a Listener? Click here for the list of Active Listeners

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4 replies
futureDeveloper OP November 10th, 2023

@Barltik2065 I am actually okay I just need an idea on other ways how to cope with it, thanks btw.

3 replies
Barltik2065 November 13th, 2023

@futureDeveloper

Glad to hear you are okay.

You are most welcome!

"... ways to cope with it."

Each person's pains and feelings are unique. You are the expert of you.

For me, I explore what has work in the past and work off that. So What has worked in the past?

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November 10th, 2023

@futureDeveloper Last weekend I felt so drained, so depressed, felt like I was giving too everyone else . so I turned my phone off completely and I felt like a massive weight was lifted off my shoulders. I felt as if I could breathe again

2 replies
futureDeveloper OP November 10th, 2023

@chipandale33 Yes that is totally a relief, that is why I leave the conversation to conserve my energy but somehow some people would say nasty things when you are just simply guarding your time and energy.

1 reply
November 10th, 2023

@futureDeveloper yeah, once I turned my phone back on the first message I got was,you're the most uncaring, confusing person. it's like people can't be appreciate or be happy if you do something good for yourself.

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communicativePond1728 November 10th, 2023

@futureDeveloper

Good question. People who use the word 'should' are just reflecting what they think THEY should be doing, unconsciously or not.

The pressures, fears and doubts they have for themselves is so extreme that it's roiling out from them and onto you, on some level.

Understanding this is freeing because it allows us to forgive that person and therefore actually embody religious teachings, even if ironically.

1 reply
futureDeveloper OP November 10th, 2023

@communicativePond1728 Thank you for your output, I learned 1 thing, thank you!

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sincereStrawberries8507 November 15th, 2023

You should also have boundaries and be able to leave a situation like that. Sometimes you have to cut the cord. Take deep breaths.