How do I find myself again?

@mrkmgll

it is hard to find who you are now ........as you will not be the person you were before this relationship.

many people do things like journal or talk it out with therapy or a friend .....

i do something i like to call self therapy...

when i have long time alone driving in car or alone at home i talk in a way like i am explaining to a therapist or someone who does not know me: i speak of how we met, how the relationship changed how i thought i felt at first... how I feel now.... what i missed in this person and what i would look for in future.

you have to be totally honest with yourself .......good bad and ugly........ and learn about your wants and boundaries you would or should have put up on relationships. this is free and IMO lets me see some important truths i have not faced ...........in why i put up with things and were my feelings really what i portrayed to them.

@mrkmgll

Let us begin with, we are not here to Judge you. You are not alone.
You are welcomed here. You are valid and your feelings are Valid.

If I am understanding correctly you are saying you are in a toxic relationship, currently, and the only love have been the one you have manifested internally.
You are in the process of finding yourself again.

It sounds like while you are in or while you were in this relationship, you lost your self-identity or individualism? And you wish to regain it again? And you are scared to be alone?

That is a lot to be dealing with. No worries, you are never alone. It is ok to feel that way at the moment. If you ever need someone to talk to you can click here for a list of the Active Listeners. They are here for you and will not judge you.

Tell us more on why you think you are afraid of being alone? Is it just being alone or your thoughts?

@mrkmgll

You're definitely in a difficult place right now, but you're strong and you'll get through it. We all support you ☺️

I'm in a similar place where I'm trying to understand why I'm scared of being alone. It's a tough journey but you can definitely do it.

I think a good starting point is expressing your feelings in a way that you can reflect on them, it can be journaling, therapy, talking to a friend or listener or even having a conversation with yourself where you respond to your thoughts and feelings. Reflecting on your thoughts might give you some clarity.

Learning who you are as an individual and learning to be comfortable with who that individual is so you can be on your own is no easy task. Remember to be patient and kind to yourself on this journey.

@mrkmgll it can be difficult not knowing who you are but that's the break through we need we got to be lost to be found I recommend this books for you. I love you and if you want any help just inbox me my heart is open to humanity. I think you might like this book – "How To Do The Work: The Sunday Times Bestseller" by Nicole LePera.

@mrkmgll

Hi 👋 I'm sorry to hear this, I know it's too difficult right now and u keep wondering how I should get back to myself and how my life was even before this relationship because now it seems that it was the only thing that defined you. BUT please before do anything else, take your time and be sad or grief or whatever u want, just let this all emotions out. Maybe u want to talk out loud with yourself or write it down or do some physical sport but just let yourself to feel everything inside u . I know it might be hard but if u don't do it and just ignore it, u will remember all this emotions again on the worst moments in the future and it might be ruin your future relationship.

Remember what u used to do when u weren't in a relationship. And believe that it will be okay from now on and u can handle this :) for me doing physical sport and be in nature really helped..:) this whole situation won't define you and u are capable and strong . Keep smiling and do some fun things to find joy again after u walked this through 😊