Heartbroken
Two days I had dental surgery, nothing extremely major but enough where I had pain meds and can only eat liquid / soft foods for about a week. This is the first time in the 4 years my boyfriend and I have been together where I have needed someone to take care of me.
Immediately after the surgery he was so loving and attentive offering to get me whatever I need and buying me flowers and just holding my hand and I felt so happy knowing I had someone to count on while I was not feeling 100%.
Within a day he had completely changed. He was going out with friends to play golf. I did not mind at all. As he was leaving I said, “I’ll call you if I need you” he got so mad at me, saying “why would you call me. I’m out. I can’t help you” and just left. Then he is oblivious and is eating his McDonalds infront of me. Even though I cannot eat and I am starving.
Later he offered to get me a new ice pack and when he picked up the older one he said “it’s still cool” I told him I knew but I wanted a colder one. He threw it at me and said “you get up yourself and get it then.”
This morning I couldn’t make up my mind about something and he lost it on me. Yelling at me, saying I was annoying and a b*tch. Accusing me of wanting to start a fight, I answered with why would I want to start a fight I’m in a lot of pain.
He has just become a complete 180 of who he was just a day ago. I am not someone who has been whining and complaining I am *** up the pain and just getting on with it.
I am really unsure of our relationship now. If I can’t rely on him for this what can I rely on him for.
@forcefulSea7026 Sounds like he wanted to play the part of loving boyfriend but resents having to do so. I’m sorry he is not being supportive and sorry you’re in pain from the surgery.
@forcefulSea7026
Many bf/partners are like this willing to play the part get the " he is so sweet" points and then it is over for them ....... they think you should snap back in a day or something and NEVER think hey if this is still an issue it must have been more serious .......
they can still be OK ......bf/ spouse etc .......just know in certain areas and situations they will be clueless.
I do not think there is a partner who fits ALL categories.. so chose a person you can work around their faults. It will always be some small gesture at first they get bored with.
I have been married a long time and if i need real help if ill or hurt .......... I seek others out... my grown kids/ best friend etc.... cause spouse sucks at comfort or taking care of me.
