Blocked by the guy I’m seeing
We are from different countries, thousand miles away. Never met irl but we have been talking for few months. I decided to fly to meet him in-person but it was a bad timing - he just lost his job, out of money, got crushed by his ex etc so the meet up wasn’t as great as we expected. Rough one. I just returned home and yesterday i found out he blocked me. I’m left puzzled, confused, frustrated, mad. Should I reach out or should I just walk away?
@Wanderer8525
It is a real risk in any long distance or online friendship/ relationship....... the meet up IRL. This often changes the fantasy we have in our head.
I wonder how many IRL meetings really go well? i only seem to hear the bad ones... sometimes real life does not match the ideas we have in our head ...about how a person is...
maybe he was embarrassed about the situation and just wanted time to think.... how did you feel it went for YOU? was he whom you thought he was did it feel comfortable or not and do you think his lost job or other issues were the only issue?
Thanks for the insights! Overall it was chaotic. Most of the time we ended up not meeting because he promised then never happened. He kept on saying he’s busy and need space. And yes embarrassed too because he’s short of cash and can’t pay for a proper date (he did once though). I think his ego was heavily crushed and I understand.
im not sure if i was too pushy - i was desperate to meet him because im only there for a week plus. So the more he pull away the more desperate i became and he doesnt like that. I guess both of us are frustrated that this is bad timing.
I talked to a few people but you are the first one who raise the issue of embarrassment. That probably explained why he just shut off unannounced- he is too embarrassed to even inform me perhaps? Our last conversation before I left, up till the moment i arrive back home - nothing abnormal nor argumentative. So i was caught surprised when he blocked me.
im still contemplating- i have an email drafted wanting to send to him. Not to blame him but is an invitation for a final conversation. I will respect his decision if he wants to go separate way but at least an honest conversation is more respectful imo. Still not sure if i should send it out…
Also just to add… it felt very comfortable actually. There was no awkwardness and things that he has been telling me are real eg where he stays, his workplace, his neighbours etc so he isn’t a “scam”. When we first met it just felt like we have known each other for very long and we just catch up!
too bad it was a really bad timing so we were both frustrated. I mean i did reflected and think it’s best we go separate ways or just stay friends. Mainly because i noticed disparity in our life values, preferred lifestyle and priorities in life. I guess he’s on the same page just that the way he showed his decision was very abrupt and not in the most emphatic way (ie blocking).
@Wanderer8525
I get it i think many are not scams but we tend to spiff the truth a bit... like a job interview LOL
The hesitation and being busy was probably he was not ready in his head about this and I really understand your short of time wanting it to happen and have a good meeting. i have an online friend i think of going to meet but worry about like you found your priorities or life view may not match up etc...
some people when embarrassed want to run or hide from it. like blocking someone.
Hi, I know it's hard it really is but best for you, walk away. He should of communicated with you instead of blocking. So sorry, the universe says you deserve someone who is going to make a big deal over you. Praying for you
