Am I in the wrong?
Ok so I went to a different city like an hr away to where my bf live with him to run an errand. On the way there he kept being on his phone so he wasn’t driving the safest and he got mad at me and yelled at me because I was tryna tell him to drive safer. That made me mad. I was already irritated because I was hungry and haven’t ate the whole day and etc. so I didn’t speak anymore.
Him:”where do you want to eat”,
me:”idc “
him:”you sure”
me:”what are my options”
Him,” it’s too late now you already said you didn’t care”
then I went silent again. I asked him that morning can he take me in a date we can go somewhere cheap like chilis and he said sure. So I dressed up. He took me to hooters. Then said we got like 40 min before we had to go finish his errands. I couldn’t believe he would take me to hooters as a “date” and I didn’t want to eat there. I didn’t even see nothing on the menu I wanted so he orderes his food and I said I don’t want anything and he got mad saying I wasted his time and money and started to cause a scene. He called me ungrateful and more and said he wasn’t doin nun else for me again. He stormed out after paying and boxing his food and went to the car and locked me out. I called my mom because I was just gonna Uber food and he said I called my mom on him I’m a grown women but calling my mom on him and got madder. He kept threatening to leave me at hooters and then an empty mall in the dark by myself In a different city. I wasn’t even driving right. The way he treated me in that moment showed me a lot about him and really hurt me. He said the next morning he wasn’t “trying” to get me out the car because if he wanted me out I woulda been out that car. I broke up with him and he acting like he did no wrong. We been together for almost a year. Am I in the wrong?
Also I kept telling him to take me to Walmart bc I’m not getting out at the closed mall.he wouldn’t take me and told me to walk. He said if he really wanted me gone I woulda took me to Walmart and I woulda been left in that city.
@persistentJar149
Heyy theree. That sounds like a really uncomfortable situation with your boyfriend, I'm sorry. From what you described, it doesn't seem like you're in the wrong.
Your concerns for his unsafe driving and inappropriate behavior at the restaurant are valid.
It's definitely not okay for him to yell at you, or ignore your feelings or threaten to leave in a potentially unsafe situation.
Breaking up with him was a strong decision to prioritize yourself and protect yourself from that treatment.
Remember, you deserve someone who respect and cares for you. Trust your instincts and feelings on how you want to be treated in a relationship.
Best wishes 💜
@persistentJar149
In the way this story has been shared ... i would say NO you are not wrong but not right either ... you do see how things were spiraling and you did not help to stop the situation.
The drive issue - you felt he was unsafe due to phone use...just telling him to drive safer .how did you do that? scolding him? ............ did you offer to drive... or offer to make calls or take message if call was that important.?
The food issue- saying you do not care ......becomes the problem when one in a couple says that... often we realize yes we DO care because a *** off partner will pick a place to annoy you.
Was your disgust at Hooters simply because how you feel about what you feel the place represents ?.. not the actual food? after saying you had not eaten and were hungry....... then deciding NOT to order could be seen as passive aggressive... i think many people would have been angry with you.
The fact you were going to Uber food for yourself and calling your mom seemed a bit childish.
If someone was going to leave you somewhere because they were angry in the situation and you instructing them where to take you etc.... seems like total disconnect.
imagine the story from his side If your ex wrote what happened what would his version be?
My guess is you need to look from another perspective. This relationship may have needed to end but you both were NOT communicating effectively and just pushing each others buttons in this escalation.