Hurt my best friend and she wants to cut all ties with me
Hello,
This is just a weird thread. Me and my friend know each other for almost 9 years now. She has been an extremely good friend. She was there with me all the time. Even if not physically, emotionally and mentally she was there. But I hurt her i hurt her a lott. There were times when may be she needed me but i was not there. May be i could not understand how should i treat her. May be i could not ever believe that someone is having my back. Before her i never shared my true self with anybody. But recently She was going through a huge situation where I should have been there but somehow i got busy with my less messy life than her. And now i jurt her so bad that she wants to cut sll ties eith me.Of course she will talk to me but just like a normal person. She wont be sharing anything with me or call me untill I am the last option she has. I dont know what to do anymore.. spologising? No hecause i every freaking time i made a mistake in last 9 years i apologised and promised that i wint repeat that again but somehow i akways hurt her. Me being with her is hurting her more may be. I dont wanna loose her at any cost. But i also dont know what should i tell her or do to make her stay in my life. It may sound cheesy but she is just the one friend whom i have respected,loved all the time. I always talk about her with my family that she is like this. She is like that n all and all the good things. Why couldnt I be a good friend why did i hyrt her do bad that she is just giving up on our friendship. Am i that bad of a friend. I am genuinely feeling disgusted just because it is me. I just dont want this person... Me
@unassumingJar1322
I'm sorry to hear you're going through this, Jar. I've had a similar incident happen to me and i get what you're feeling. Sometimes we don't understand what the other person is feeling or we don't notice the hints they drop of something being wrong. We don't know what happened, how it happened, we just know that it was beautiful at first but then it ended up like this, we can't explain the process in between, we thought everything was going fine and that this is how it should go in the future too but we don't realise some actions of ours hurt the other person. I know they won't accept apologies because they wouldn't want to start it over and end up being hurt again, it's the trust that they have lost and it's a difficult thing to gain but very easy to lose. "I wouldn't look for comfort in the same hands that broke me". That's what my friend said to me the day she ended all ties with me, i know it's hard to deal with this because you've never had a friend like them and you know you can't move on, but if it gets toxic it'll start eating you up. Give them some time, and have conversations once in a while, if they don't want to come back, we cannot force it, it'll end up hurting us instead, it will get easies with time, if they left that means someone else is meant for you, i know you might be feeling guilty about hurting them, but you didn't realise, and that's why it's called a mistake, just that some mistakes are bigger than others, but that doesn't mean you'll start blaming yourself for everything.
Things will get better, don't lose hope ❤️