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Feeling good about walking away from 25 year friendship

User Profile: Summershy
Summershy May 6th

After 25 years, I decided to walk away from what I thought was a close friend.  As I said, I feel really good about it.   This is also the first time that I have re-evaluated the situation

For one thing, I had been going through a serious situation in my own life.  At first, she was able to talk to me about it.  Then the next, she suddenly had her crisis and needed to take care of herself and didn't have time to talk to me on the phone.  This was at the end of last summer. 

Since I had been leaving her alone while attempting to reach out now and then.   She has mostly been ignoring my calls, while I have been moving on and keeping busy in my own life.

However, yesterday was the straw that broke the camel's back when she very rude.  "I can't talk right now, I am dealing with an emergency."   Click.   At that point, I reached the end of my limit with her and decided not to call her anymore.   

Second, I realized that things were very one-sided with her.  I would be the one doing all the calling and reaching out while she never reciprocated

Third, she would always dump her problems on me  from day 1 and it was always everything and everyone's fault

Fourth - She has always been paranoid that her local government was out to get her

Fifth - She seemed to compete with me by telling me these stories that I now have to question

Sixth- She made some false promises to me

Seventh - She could not keep her stories straight 

Eighth - Her stories were questionable

So while I was sad yesterday, I am ok if we don't ever talk to her again.  However, this is the second friend who dumped me when I needed her the most.  However, I feel like we have been drifting apart after our last conversation. 



2
User Profile: WarmLightXO
WarmLightXO May 19th

Hi @Summershy :)

That sounds really empowering. I'm sorry everything went down the way it did, but glad that you're able to step up and take care of yourself. I hope you're proud of your growth <3

-Elliot

1 reply
User Profile: Summershy
Summershy OP May 20th

@WarmLightXO

Thank you for your kind words because she is not being very nice.    I didn't tell the full story when attempting to contact her.    I attempted to call her three times which is now two weeks ago.   The first time she hung up when I said, "Hi."   The second time, she hung up, and the third was when she made the other excuse.

In the meantime, as I re-evaluated the friendship, I realized that wasn't that interested and nor was she as supportive as she made herself out to be.


For example, she ignored my phone calls by refusing to pick up the phone a few years back.  Then when I got ahold of her last year, she made an excuse about dealing with lots of junk calls. 

Then there were other times where I would attempt to call her but she would ignore my calls and then just completely disappear.  


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