Asking my friend to respect me
One if my best friends always calls me an endearment (think sweetie, dear, honey) and I absolutely hate it. I always read it as condescending and dismissive, even though I know she doesn't mean it that way. I've come to realize I simply have wider personal boundaries than her. Last time I tried to ask her to stop she got crazy mad at me because she "calls everyone that!"
I know she means well but I'm getting to the point I want to stop talking to her entirely. Anyone have a suggestion on how I can bring it up to her?
Maybe you can go more in details when asking her not to do that, explaining better how it feels and why, making sure she knows that you feel it as belittling you though you are aware that she means it in a good way, but you just can't help it. Sometimes honesty is the best way to solve things, maybe she just doesn't understand how deeply it hurts, but when she'll understand, she'll put your wellbeing first because she's your friend, she cares about how you feel.
@TeaCupPangolin
If she says she calls everyone this and it's a term of endearment, then she probably means it. Some people grow up speaking in a certain way. How important is this to you? Is this worth losing a friend ship over? Have you considered accepting your friend for who and what she is. I imagine there are a lot worse things she could call a person.
Maybe this isn't such a great friendship to begin with and you are finding fault with little things? Could there be something else going on, on a deeper level? How well do you and she negotiate on other things? Is this really where you choose to draw the line?
It sounds as if you already brought it up to her and it didn't go over so well. Maybe it's best to leave it alone and be happy that you have a friend.
