Emotional Pain
Ever feel physical pain when you’re heartbroken?
I feel so torn. How do people just let go when they break up and see someone else?
is the pain in my chest me fighting to let go of someone I have loved so so many years?
He left me multiple times and I kept letting him back in. Now he’s dating someone else. This time I am trying to see someone else and move on too. But he came back to ask me to marry him and I said no.
Was I stupid? I want to be happy. I don’t want to be in fear of sharing my feelings. Starting over is scary but losing him completely is even scarier.
I feel so much pain I don’t know how to deal with it. I can’t talk to my new person in my life about it either because I don’t want to scare them off. I thought I was over him but he had to come and say those things to me. I question if I am meant to be happy
@sympatheticCranberry4498
If he is dating someone else and has moved on before ... but you move on and he proposes? that sound like he wants you to always be there ... let him continue dating or whatever but you will wait.... so many women say their "fiance" but he is still seeing others.
You were not stupid to say no ... it was the best move...
We all worry if we cannot find some one else ... or will we fall in love again ... i think it is the false notion that there is only one person in the world... i thought that at one time but found that is not true... It may not be the same feelings ....... but it can be better as well. Expecting the exact same relationship experience with another is why some say it is not same .... open yourself to new instead or recreating a failed situation.
@toughTiger6481
Thank you.. And you're right.. To consider continuing with the same patterns and even to continue with the same moves will only prove insanity. That would be fruitless and most wasteful.. I know I can love more and am worthy to receive a real love as well
Sorry for the long story: I dated my highschool sweetheart for 8 years. He hid stuff from me and lied, he ended up leaving me and "moved on" a day later (cheated). 6 months of no contact for me was horrible. I went to the hospital because I was so depressed. I didn't eat, sleep, shower...nothing I was rotting in bed and I was thinking about taking my own.. and that right there made me question everything! From that day I went to therapy and started to talk to people and going out. It's was coming to the 6 month mark and I see my call logs...he was calling me the whole time after being with her. Eventually we started talking and I sat my boundaries and standards with him and everything was going well for a couple of months and we started dating again but a few weeks later he started again and I was battling with myself mentally and I stopped therapy (for financial reasons) we kept on dating anyway but it didn't get better (of course we had our good days) I thought that was enough to stay because I kept praying to God to help me and for him to change. That went on for a year. He broke up with me again in this past june (both of us still not learning) we kept on talking as friends but everytime he wanted more and he even asked me to marry him and I said no to everything. No to intimate relations, no to dating and no to marriage. I never thought I would be able to say that but I saw that things needed to change for the better and that's me leaving him. Till this day he calls me and it's really hard. I basically grew up with this person and just to see him get worse and doing horrible things. At this moment he is incarcerated. I'm scared to move on and to start socializing again. I'm very introverted and all this is difficult and different for me. All I want to say that even though I'm going through this I still think that I deserve to be happy and I'm going to get there...don't give up! If things are ment to be they will be.
@sympatheticCranberry4498 This sounds like a very difficult time, and yes heartbreak can definitely manifest as physical pain, especially when you're letting go of someone you've loved for so long. Although the pain you're feeling is difficult to deal with, you're in the healing process.
It takes a great amount of strength to say no, and you're very brave for doing so. You weren't stupid for saying no, you were choosing your well-being and what you know you deserve in a relationship.
It's okay to feel scared about restarting, just remember that you deserve to be with someone who makes you feel safe and valued in the relationship. You deserve happiness and it will come, just give it time. It's perfectly okay to give yourself some time to think things over. You're not alone in this, and things will get better!
Thank you. It really has been difficult. He actually just blocked me again because I wasn’t there to answer the phone every time he called. He was sneaking around to call me. Telling me that he was leaving her again and that he wants me back. That he’s miserable. At the same time I was thinking, if this was just some sick joke or just karma letting me know he got what he asked for and now he has to deal with what he chose to do. I’ll miss our good times and the moments we shared, I’ll miss him too. I won’t miss the pain and the silence he put me through. Though it did make me stronger. He really put me through the ringer. I feel even more awkward when I socialize now because I’m constantly apologizing even more and worried I doing wrong or overstepping when in truth I’m just overthinking every little thing now. I have never been in a healthy relationship, to the point I thought that being with him, was at some point, my healthiest relationship. I had four missed calls the other night while I was out in a loud place with my kid. I text saying I was out and got no response. I called back the next day to check if he was okay but I hung up out of fear this new woman was going to answer and say awful things to me. It really sucks when I know I was there first and even if she doesn’t know she was dating him while we were still together.. I dont wish bad on them. Maybe they will both find peace one day, together and or otherwise. I don’t want to be a part of that mess.. I do feel I deserve better
I feel you, my girlfriend just brokeup with me and I’m suffering with dealing with my emotions, i’m still in love and she dont want us to get back togather even though i’ve tried to do so. It’s really exhausting.
Sending you hugs (if that’s okay) I know that’s not easy. Especially when you want it to work and want things to get better or go back the way they were at its peak. I hope you find happiness again and heal too
