Time To Talk Day: Love And Mental Health Discussion

@SilentSerenityy

*This is in reply to number 6! To not get burned out with someone with a mental illness, that person can take some time to do research on it, and learn more about the effects of it, and why their partner/friend acts or thinks a certain way that may be "odd" or "frustrating" to them. This can help expose them to the mental illness more and understand them a little better.

*In reply to number 10, I would say that yes, it can be a bit hard to be with someone with a mental illness, ecspically if you are used to hanging around other people who doesn't have that persistent difference.

@SilentSerenityy How would I describe love? I would describe it as a bond that involves a connection and understanding between forces. The way I put it is a bit scientific, but its the way I've always felt when I experienced love. Whether it be with a bestfriend, sibilings, boyfriend/girlfriend, or my dog, Its been a really down packed and simple way to define it. Love is such an alluring feeling. It can also be complex for me. Sometimes I feel it in my heart, or my fingers may tingle, I feel relaxed, jumpy, or just simply excited ❤. I would compare it to eating Chinese food or Cookie dough lol.

@SilentSerenityy

I'm going to start off with the icebreaker . I hope more people can reply to this and answer more stuff as we go! Love is such a beautiful thing, but a lot of people feel like they don't get it or don't feel it at all! But especially when you're in love, you feel unstoppable and like your relationship can overcome anything . Love happens in so many shapes and forms, there just isn't one particular way! It's unique and sweet~

@SilentSerenityy

Icebreaker

How would you describe love? Lets see I would describe it as feeling as though no matter what they do you still want to be with them. Through the good and the bad they make you feel like a better person.

Questions

1. What effect can love have on mental illness? I think that love can make mental illness better. True love or the love you feel for family I feel should make you stronger, better.

2. What are some positive effects of love on mental illness? Stress could be lessened by love as in a good relationship, be it family or between partners, they can help you deal with the stresses of life.

3. What are some negative effects of love on mental illness? I think that sometimes love can cause more stress.

4. What are some ways that mental illness can affect how we treat our loved ones? When we have a mental illness we may not always be thinking right or another words we may be quick to react instead of taking our time to realize that our loved ones are trying to help us not hurt us.

4A. How can this make them feel? As in the case of my ex-husband it made him feel usless. He was a fixer, but he was unable to fix my illness. For some that can be vary frustrating and can confuse their feelings both toward us and as to how we feel about them.

5. How can our loved ones mental illness affect how they treat us? I know for example I wasn't always very loving toward my ex-husband. I wasn't aware of how I was treating him. By ignoring him and pulling into myself I ended up making him feel as though I didn't love him. Even though that wasn't the case at the time it was how he saw it.

5A. How can this make us feel? I know that it made me feel worthless. Even worse than I already did. Knowing that I was hurting him made me feel even worse....made my depression worse. A never ending cycle.

6. What ways can we cope when a loved one has a serious mental illness so that we are not emotionally burned out/exhausted? I know for me I just wanted my ex-husband to read about my mental illness. To find out more about it. If he had just read about it maybe he would have understood it more. Instead it just upset him, that he couldn't make sence of why I could feel sad all the time when I had so much going for me.

7. How can we support a loved one through a mental illness? My son has mild depression and I know that to help him I am always reading and asking questions of doctors. Trying to find ways to help him deal with what makes him sad. All while not ignoring what makes him sad just trying to help him see that it is ok to be sad about those things.

8. What are the challenges we face when we mix love and mental illness? Sometimes it's hard to deal with my son for example because like my ex-husband I feel the need to fix him but I can't. But also when you mix love with a mental illness it naturally will create challenges like episodes of extreem sadness or stress related issues.

9. How can we combat challenges we face when we mix love and mental illness? In my opinion the best way to combat challenges is to do everything you can to learn and understand them. Find out what the triggers are and try to avoid them. If they are unavoidable then see if you can find a way to diffuse sittuations as they arrise. It won't work everytime. Like any illness things are going to happen. You can be allergic to cats and thus do everything you can to avoid them, but you should still carry meds on you to combat alleric symptoms in case say you hug a friend who ownes a cat.

10. Is love and mental illness always challenging? Why or why not? Well I'd like to say no it's not always a challenge but the truth (in my opinion) is that life is a challenge. Like the allergy to cats, no one is perfect. You can walk into a store one day and rub up against someone you don't even know that has a cat and end up having a reaction. But that doesn't mean you should stop going to the store.

11. Can love and mental illness ever make things easier? How so? Personally yes, I think love can certainly make things easier. Everyone can always use a shoulder.

12. What advice would you give someone with mental illness in a relationship? Communicate. No matter what talk to your partner, your kids, your family. The more you tell them the better your bad days can be. Even if you start off by telling them yesterday was a bad day for you because......... then the next time that happens they will understand more and can maybe do something to make it better.