Scared
Everyone knows how much letting it all out is good for you, but i feel like Im scared from doing that and opening up no matter what..i have people who support me but Im so terrified of having them change their minds about me, or having them worry about me because there has been some instances where the truth came out(TW what i did to myself) and they acted very differently, guilty in a way. And i feel like such a bother, like lets be honest here who wants to hear negative stuff on most days, theyll just end up leaving me :( i honestly dunno what to do anymore cos its been difficult dealing with this all alone, plus theres a friend who i made this promise to tell him everything thats happening but i dont want to lose him. I appreciate him way too much to risk that
@bluePenny9242 Hey Penny, I appreciate you reached out and shared your experience with us. I am sorry for the delay in response. You know 'i can relate to your thoughts. It is natural to feel this way because you care and do not want to lose them.
How about taking it to step by step? Maybe open up a little bit, allow the person to digest it and understand you. It may help you figure out if they are really supportive to you or there is a change in the behavior of how they treat or think about you?
I guess if someone cannot handle a piece of information about you, then no matter what they say, there is no point to share your complete story with them.
We all are here with you to support and listen. Feel free to share anything you want to.
How is it going now?
@bluePenny9242
i can relate you too as i'm feeling almost like you sometimes i really want to tell everything to him , but i'm 😨 how he'll react & will he still want me as a friend .
@bluePenny9242
Hi honey,
When I say I know exactly how you feel, believe me, I DO! My whole entire life, the perception of me and who I am I always wanted everyone else to accept. I would change myself for other people so that I wouldn't scare them away with who I really am. My mental health can vary from really good to 'hey, something is really wrong.' I don't want to make this too long but you should know that if you open up to someone about how you feel and they walk away from you, please let them. That person is not worth trying to get back. Their lack of understanding and compassion is not for you to try and change. I get it, sometimes people just end up getting better and healing from their own situations so they don't want a relapse. But usually those people will at least check on you and make sure you're alright. That's always better than someone who just walks away.
The fact that you have opened up and people have walked away, is probably the reason why you have this fear of ever opening up again. I know that sometimes I get scared of opening up to my mother (my best friend) because she takes a more aggressive approach when it comes to trying to help me and it makes me very uncomfortable and not want to talk about my feelings.
Just know that you're here for a reason and that it's okay to open up. If someone judges you, let them. What they think about you is none of your business. They aren't worth being apart of your life. I love you, I hope this helped in some way or another. x