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What did you do to get over a breakup?

User Profile: Shailaa21
Shailaa21 June 9th, 2016

Might be breaking up with my bf soon.. what are methods that helped you get over it?

5
User Profile: Sventek
Sventek June 9th, 2016

@Shailaa21

1. I read a good book on the subject, Letting Go - A Twelve Week Personal Action Program to Overcome a Broken Heart." by: Dr. Zev Wanderer and Tracy Cabot, PhD.

2. I focused on me. I joined a gym and actually went.

3. I read books, swam, biked, hiked, and got myself out of the house.

4. Since the place that I lived in was a place we shared together, I moved.

5. I avoided the places that we used to frequent together, with a few exceptions as the Sushi House was too good to let go and they make an excellent Lion King (Sushi, Baked Salmon over a California Roll)

6. I admitted to myself that while it hurt, it was actually for the best. Now that I'm well past the situation, looking back, it WAS for the best but it was hard for me to see it then because I was so emotionally drawn into the situation itself. It's hard to look at something from an objective prospective when you have such a high emotional investment with the person.

7. I came to the firm conclusion that the situation could not have been fixed and no matter how much I thought we made a good team, we didn't in the end.

8. I wrote down the reasons why things did not work out and kept it with me... added to it from time to time as those ideas came to me. Also, I wrote down what I learned from the situation because that is a key part of moving forward instead of dwelling. Lastly, I made a full action plan of how my life was going to be different and followed it.

9. I spent time with friends who had nothing to do with the relationship I just left.

10. I did not try to do this alone because I realized that I needed people around me as a support system to get me through it. I was so very right.

I hope that you are able to discover some of the things I did in my own life as part of this process (and yes, it's a process)... and that your next relationship far exceeds your expectations compared to the relationship you just left.

2 replies
User Profile: Shailaa21
Shailaa21 OP June 10th, 2016

@Sventek

This is a great post! If we do end up breaking up will deff be using these tips! Thank you!blush

User Profile: Lolie
Lolie June 24th, 2016

@Sventek my boyfriend broke up with me last week. It has been really hard. Definitely I will use this list! Thank you

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User Profile: gloriousJoy07
gloriousJoy07 June 19th, 2016

I did give myself time , I tried to be more and more with friends , i also focused on me more- started exercising, I also got a book on Breakup and read that , I travelled for sometime , it did get better with time

User Profile: neverendingStar20
neverendingStar20 June 25th, 2016

When my boyfriend and I first broke up I took it very hard. But in order to move on i just gave myself time, which wasn't an easy task at all. I did not want to give myself time, I wanted to feel better the next day. But day by day it gets better, and the pain you feel starts going away.

Oh and stay active!