Recovering from sociopath
Recently ended a relationship with a high functioning narc sociopath (anti social PD) and wanted to try and connect with anyone else that has survived a relationship with one! Finding it very difficult to pick up the pieces again. I have a counsellor who I see weekly but she knows little about ASPD so isn't able to offer the right level of support! Help please?
@Aliceinlalaland
Never a romantic relationship, but I have a close friend with ASPD. I believe his case is fairly minor in comparison to most others, and he is actively trying to overcome it, but I do know a bit about how difficult it can be to try and maintain any type of relationship with someone with ASPD.
@Kaeneus thank you for your response, in the end maintaining the relationship was impossible, I couldn't even maintain a friendship because he would lie about the most absurd things! What's difficult now is staying away and putting the pieces back together. He did what all good sociopaths do and systemically played on all my insecurities and vulnerabilities so I ended up with the belief that I was worthless and that my life is empty without him! Logically I know it's untrue but my heart is yet to catch up with my brain!
@Aliceinlalaland
I'm so sorry to hear you went through all that. It sounds like you logically understand that manipulaters will do what manipulaters do, but that logic isn't enough to override feelings, in some cases. It's hard to just switch off the grieving of a relationship because someone has ASPD. "But he was a sociopath" aren't magic words that make a break up not hurt.
I understand what you mean about the lying. My friends does that all the time too. And the betrayal of it. Sometimes I feel like giving up entirely. But I do believe (maybe foolishly) that he is fundamentally a good person, who is trying to do better, and trying to fight this condition. It sounds like your ex wasn't any of those things. There's definitely a scale for severity with ASPD and my friend is definitely on the lower end.
