Is it abuse or PTSD?

My husband of almost 14 years has progressively gotten worse with him temper and screaming at me and the kids.

He does have severe PTSD from deployments. I’m also a veteran.

But at what point are his outburst considered abuse? Last night he was screaming at our 8 yr old while I was outside with the dog, I opened the back door to find my 8 yr old recoiling away from his dad to was yelling at him like he was an adult. I said that’s not necessary and he proceeded to screen at me. Fine, at least your off of the 8yr old. And then he reached a point where he was so mad that he attempted to pick up our dinning room table and throw it while our son was sitting there eating. Our son, now covered in his food and screaming because he’s now terrified and rightly so, got up and I grabbed him and the 2 old girls and got them to a bedroom so I could check my son. He was ok, just scared. I went back out and told my husband to leave. It took him an hour to finally leave. He turned his location off, won’t talk to me. He tried to make me out to be the bad guy and told me that if he was worth it I would leave the house and come to him. NOPE, that’s how murders happen. I woke up this morning to find he had come home at some point this morning and took my 8 yr old to the store.

My kids are now terrified of this man, I’m pissed. I don’t know what needs to happen next? I’ve asked him to get anger management and counseling in the past but he refused.

If I seek a divorce I don’t even know what my grounds would be? I need to make sure my kids are protected. This man is vindictive as hell, and I’m afraid he’ll purposely do something to get back at me or that he’ll try to take the kids in court.