How Do You Escape?
How does one even break up with a person? I can't articulate well verbally so I mainly express myself in writing but everyone acts like text messages and letters are a cowardly way to break up. Well, I don't really care if I'm being cowardly. All I know is everything inside of me is saying fly away. The only thing making me hesitate is I know he'll get hurt and he'll miss me but I can't do this anymore. I'm getting hurt and I'm not happy. There are a hundred things I want that he won't let me have. I can't express myself, I can't defend myself with him. I haven't loved him in I don't know how long. We are not friends. I don't think I even like him.
I've never broken up before and I'm nervous and I feel guilty all the time even though I haven't done it yet. We've been together for 5 years, or it would be 5 years in July. I want to be free. I want so much to be free. I wish he didn't love me so i could go without hurting anybody. As I've said before in a letter, "I wish I could do this without hurting you. I wish I could do that without hurting me."
@IGuessIAmAPlatypus It sounds like in spite of the breakdown in your relationship, you do have a certain amount of care for him. Otherwise you wouldn't be so conflicted with breaking up with him. Unfortunately there is no easy way to break up with someone. Or at the very least, whatever way you do break up with someone who does still love or care for you, will always cause pain. Sadly, that is not something you can avoid happening, nor is it something that they can avoid either. If breaking up with him is something you truly want and desire (and from what you're expressing, the love you had for him has been long over), releasing him is the most loving thing you can do now. As much as you deserve to be free and to find someone that you love, he deserves that as well. You both deserve partners who are committed to the relationship and will love you. From what you're expressing, not breaking up is only avoiding the inevitable. The more you wait, the more pain you both will end up experiencing.
If you were in his shoes, how would you like someone to break up with you? In situations where you are confused as to how to go about a painful event, the best thing to do is to put yourself in their shoes. I can't promise you that it will be easy but sometimes doing the right thing is very hard. At the very least, you will always have 7cups to support your decision. 
Good luck! 
Dear @IGuessIAmAPlatypus ,
Just follow your heart and you can't be wrong. You seem to have a strong desire to leave him but at the same time you're so kind for not wanting to hurt him. But, it's definitely true as there is no other easier way that you can take if you want to be free of him.
You said that you want to write to him, perhaps you just want to make yourself clear about why you're breaking up, as I felt the same too when I gave my ex a letter explaining my reasons why.
You're an absolutely wonderful and beautiful woman in life, and you deserve to achieve your own happiness in life, and there is nothing wrong with being honest and telling him what he has done wrong through the letter. If you doubt that merely breaking up with a letter could seem cowardly, perhaps you could give the letter to him in person?
There's always two sides of a coin. If you think that breaking up with him could hurt him, what if you view it from another perspective and see that making him realize what he has done wrong could help him improve himself in another relationship in the long run? Since you said that he was very critical of you in your relationship in another thread you've posted, perhaps he was not completely satisfied with the current relationship as well, and pointing out what went wrong may help him find his own happiness in the future.
Always keep in mind that 7 cups got your back, and someone who is as brave as you are to tell your story here, I believe you will truly make the best decision for yourself. Of course, you have my 100% support dear.
Sincerely,
Snow 