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House of Glass

User Profile: ashwashere1336
ashwashere1336 May 7th, 2023

Hey, my name is Chelsea. I'm new here. Trying to find support for everything going on in my mind and my life.

A little background- I am 32 and a divorced single mom. The divorce was within the past year and really traumatic, involving a lot of painful circumstances.

Segue into now- I am super busy, super stressed, but find myself dating again anyway. It sort of just happened- I started talking to someone, we really hit it off and now we're going on dates, talking on the phone each day etc. He is moving kind of fast which is sort of stressful but I know it comes from a good place so I don't say anything. This person I met is really kind and caring compared to what I am used to and I don't want to seem ungrateful or hurt his feelings.

I think I am still recovering mentally from my divorce. It's stupid because I know I should be "over it" by now. But there is still a lot of drama with my ex; he is not the most emotionally stable person. He found out I was seeing someone and got super angry and started blowing me up with nasty tests.

Anyway, the new guy wants to stay over for a weekend now. I told him yes because he is so excited and happy and it's such a big deal for him to do (he has never stayed over anywhere like that before). He really cares about me and just seems super excited. I have noticed that any remote indication on my part, however, that I might want to scale things back a bit seems to really deflate him, making me feel guilty (so I just quit telling him no on stuff for the most part).

I am trying to figure out what I am doing here. I feel like I have gotten in over my head and just don't know how to handle this situation as delicately as possible with regard to everyone involved.

3
User Profile: hopefulPond6108
hopefulPond6108 May 7th, 2023

@ashwashere1336 Hard in a new relationship to express your needs for fear it might have a negative effect? What are the dangers of slowing things down to a comfortable speed?

2 replies
User Profile: ashwashere1336
ashwashere1336 OP May 7th, 2023

@hopefulPond6108 That's a great question; TBH I live in constant fear of hurting anyone's feelings, especially if they're nice to me

User Profile: ashwashere1336
ashwashere1336 OP May 7th, 2023

@hopefulPond6108 You're cool btw and thank you for your replies

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