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He dumped me because of my Depression
Kitsuyume May 21st, 2015
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So, this is happening in Singapore.

My ex-boyfriend broke up with me last tuesday on the 12th... our 2-month anniversary. His parents were pestering him to break up with me every night since they found out I was on antidepressants. They believed that I had to take it for life and there was a high chance of me relapsing. My ex protested but he eventually gave in.

He took back what he said before we got together that he didn't mind my depression, but now he does for 2 reasons: I might relapse in 10 years down the road, and my dysfunctional family can never be changed. He's looking past the fact that I'm a lot better and happy now, and that I am going to complete my university degree.

When I asked if there was anything I could say or do to make him stay, he said that there wasn't and the only time we can be together is in the future when his parents kick the bucket :( which means never.He wanted us to stay friends immediately, and I tried to tell him I needed space... but I blew up at him that he was hurting me when he was trying to tell me to continue our daily texts. After that, he said there was a sudden void in his heart, and talking with me only filled half of it.

A really helpful listener Duff26 told me my reaction to it was like picking at a scab of a wound, not letting myself heal. I'm really thankful for hearing that. Scab-picking is a problem of mine...

2
Pickle68 May 21st, 2015
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You are worthy of love. If he is going to set conditions of his interaction becasue of his parents or put conditions on how you must live, especially about things you cannot control, I would proceed with caution. He's not as confident in himself as you think nor as confident as he needs to be to support you when you need it most.

Anybody can be a friend or lover when things are going good. So he wouldn't want to be with you if you were severely ill? Depressed? Get cancer? Have an auto accident? You see where I am going with this?

He has to love your heart, mind, and soul, through the thick and thin. I can guarantee you that the person you are will not exist in 5 years. It will be replaced by someone that is stronger, more mature, more aware, and looks back with more perspective? If you get BETTER will he still be around? Who knows.

Love yourself, and accept yourself, depression and all. If he can't do the same, well, that's his loss.

dlpeter May 21st, 2015
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For his parents to influnce his choice, he never really understood you a great deal. Based on his time with you, he should have had his own concontrete reasons as to why it was worth taking the risk.

Friendship? What ever void that needs to be fill should be done by him. You're not obligated to fill his void.

I have nothing against anyone who doesn't want to take up someone who may pose a particular challenge. Not everyone has the strength.

What gets me the most is that he doesn't realizes how bad he sounds especially when he mentioned that they might have to kick the bucket.Can you really rely on someone for emotional strength on bigger issues when he is not even in control of his life?

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