Divorce

I am thinking about divorcing my husband because I am becoming more and more aware of how mentally and emotionally abusive he is and had been in the past. My concern is that we just had a 5 month old son and I’m afraid of what type of legal things have to go on during divorces. I want to share him 50/50 with my husband but am afraid if he becomes nasty during everything that things could go bad in court. Can someone explain how much a court HAS to get involved if both parties are civil about everything? What about if I am civil and he isn’t? I don’t want anything from him. He can keep all the money, the house, and everything in it. I just want my clothes, a car, and shared time with my son. This is so devastating to be thinking about.