Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
  1. Forum
  2. Relationship Stress
  3. Confusing Breakup

Confusing Breakup
Temesgen9 February 27th, 2022
.

We had a great few dates. He told his parents about me but since I was from a different culture than them, they didn't want me to be with him. So he decided immediately that 100% it can not work. I accepted and tired to be friends as he suggested. But I got mixed signs where clearly he loves me, so it was a struggle in my heart why he won't fight for love. And also prejudice is something that I hate & I wanted him to have the courage to stand up for me. He should at least talk to his parents and they should get to know me a little.

Anyhow, as time passed, I continued to struggle. He felt guilty, very guilty. So he helped me emotionally, and because of that I loved him more. He was also rejecting me each time which restarted my pain/healing process. Now I am just trying to not contact him at all, and seeking therapy to heal. I can't take anymore rejections. And I don't understand why he has no hope.

2
Lifeonmars787 February 27th, 2022
.

Hi, I'm sorry to hear that you are having a hard time and I understand your point of view. I believe some people take family approval of their relationships very seriously, to the point of breaking up with their loved ones if that approval is not there. For them it will be reason enough. You say you can't understand, but this is more about you than him. He has already spoken, however you think his is not an acceptable reason. We are all different, we will not be able to share all the choices that others make. But this does not matter, since the choices of others must be respected, not contested, even when it is difficult. Prioritize yourself and your needs: if you want a relationship and this person is not available, don't insist; step away and look for a connection elsewhere. I hope going to therapy can help you heal. All the best.


Temesgen9 OP February 27th, 2022
.

Yes I get it but I think if he knew that about his parents, he should have discussed with them 1st before dragging me in so far deep. If they want same culture, find same culture lady. The guy is 39 not 20.

*Support Forum Disclaimer
My communities
Community guidelines
Report an issue
Considering Therapy?
Talk to an expert therapist