Apologies for the last post

@soyboyaustin

Hey there, hopefully you are doing well. There's a few things I would like to point out;

I tried to copy and paste what i said to someone so i i didn't have to retype it, however today was the first time in years that I've hurt myself on purpose. (I can see you are going through a very tough and hard time, it's important to realize that there's still hope everything will be okay. Hurting yourself can definetly increase the pain of how you are feeling) I feel so pathetic, I just haven't found a healthy way to deal with this breakup. (Dealing with a breakup can definetly be tough, and so many emotions come at once while trying to heal from it. I can sense you have tried a lot of things to deal with this breakup, and from the sounds of it have been a hurtful process for you, which is normal since you probably still love her) She told me i was a great guy and anyone would be lucky to have me, but i just wanted her to be happy with me she's going through alot. She's back with her abusive ex, (This is a red flag here, its an indication she has poor boundaries. A lot of people from traumatic attachment background tend to have powerful attraction/connection/bond for people who are not right for them, so often at times they will go for those who are not right for them than choosing someone who respect them) I don't care if she didn't choose me but why go from someone who wanted the best for you and wanted to love and cherish you to that? (90% of her will tell her to go back to him since it feels familiar, as in how her family treated her, so she will go for people like that because she doesn't have the awareness. I do feel you put her needs, wants and happiness first than your own as well, so that would also cause some issues in the relationship) I just don't feel any self worth if that's the case, (I feel like most people would definetly feel that way after a breakup. The relationship seemed to have its issues, but it doesn't mean you are not worthy. I do sense you tend to feel worthy through other people, so if they leave it is where you begin to lose yourself) feels like love is just pointless and dead. No one really cares about what i have to say, they just tell me to get over it or find someone new. (It's hurtful knowing people tell you those things without taking the time to listen to what you have to say. You definetly deserve empathy and understanding for how you feel) I don't want to, i don't want anyone else. (This is completly normal, you still have feelings for her, so its normal you want her) I'm probably just braindead but i just wish this was all a bad dream. (You are not braindead at all, you are just going through a lot of hurt and pain from the breakup)