I hope I can make it

I promise I’m not faking

All of this is genuine

I feel like I’m starting to get better and then

I’m reminded of how worthless I am

I don’t make other people’s problems my own

I’m just trying to hold unto what’s left of my hope

Just see me for who I am

I don’t want to sugar coat or hold back my plans

Just please understand

I know it’s hard but just try to see

I’m so much more than my mistakes

But I can’t even show them because I’ll be called a disgrace

You don’t understand 

I have to cover up to protect

Not just you, but my heart 

Cause the more people know the more they stare

I just want to be more than how I felt there

But if you don’t know you don’t believe

But if you do you won’t let me be

I just want to be free

Free from guilt 

Free from shame

Free from feeling like I don’t belong in this place

Attention is the last thing I want

So how dare you think that is the cause

Everyone thinks there’s a secret motive

They can’t seem to accept the moment 

No one believes this is me

Or how this is who I have become to be

You just don’t know so you disagree

Disagree on what’s going on with me

I’m struggling can’t you see

There’s so much inside of me

I can’t escape it

I hope I can make it

I don’t know how much longer I can take it

I wish you could understand-

None of this was ever my plan