Stormy waters

The waves are restless

It's high tide tonight

Swimming against the current

No life jacket in sight

Hands reaching out in the darkness

Disoriented and confused

My body still fighting

Emotionally bruised

Gasping for air

Between Truth and lies

Suffocating on what's reality

Or his deceiving disguise

This disguise which brings doubt

Am I somehow to be blamed

Bringing chaos to my mind

Guilt tripped and ashamed.

Logic and reason are tumbling

Into deep Waters crashing in his game

Trying to make me crazy

My thoughts are taking strain

It's like I Know how to swim

And make it to shore

Yet self doubt sets in

And I don't remember anymore

After all my fighting to survive

There he Will stand

Pretending to be this saviour

And reach out this hand

To rescue me from the places

I swam  from to get away

From his manipulation and insanity

He begs me just to stay

I began to identify the problem

Like pollution in this sea

But so much damage had been done

To my own Sense of reality

The waves remained restless

Questioning the thoughts in my mind

Self doubt pulled me back under

As if my self confidence went blind

Swimming against the current backwards

Between nothing and maybe

Feeling lost and confused

And the beginning of crazy.

My mind a battle ship

Fighting a war

He chips away at my boundries

Until I can't fight him no more.

Exhausted and depleted

I make it back to shore

I give in and reach out to his cold icy hand

Ashamed and angry for letting him...

Win once more.