OUR ORIGINAL POETRY: Share It Here

@Annie Thank you.

I isolate myself from the crowd
because I don't want to get too
attached to people that i know
wll leave me.

I'm breaking and no one sees it
I thought I was over it
But change is a word I encounter
every single day.

Loneliness,
A word I don't know how to encounter
Happiness,
The feeling I can't comprehend
But I realize the two come together
And make my favourite thing:
Lonely happiness

Maybe I'll try making myself happy
So others don't have to.

@casi1i wooooah what aaaare thoooooooooooose

The nail polish I wore on our last date

is chipping away slowly but surely

Just as I'm trying

to chip thoughts of you from my memory

Now I'll grieve for the could have beens

But when this paint

fully falls from my fingertips

so too will I relinquish

the grasp you have

upon my love.

That is so crazy you had me on the nail chipping part after a break up! I didn't care during that time but I noticed it myself. @CourageDearHeart

@MzLexusLove, this is amazingly good. The metaphor is brilliant.

It didnt work, It never did.

Through my grasp it slid.

Now I ask myself was it really there?

Or an illusion just true to be fair.

I wanted it to go on, thinking I found it,

But nope,it turned out to be the same old ___.

I know the positives and negatives of all,

But my thoughts make me fall.

I guess someday the reality of my thoughts will change,

That day it will be strange,

Cause I have known predictability too long,

That my doubts have become more strong.

I know for one, someone must be like me,

The search continues till I am free.

Free from the loneliness,

From the actual mess.

Dear @Angell, The emotions expressed here are deep. I especially like the parts where the narrator doubts the memories, whether it really happened. Thank you for sharing your poem.

@Annie Thank you

Hi, I got a pm from @2genPoet asking me to post the announcement for his meeting tomorrow of the POETRY WRITERS DISCUSSION.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Poetry Writers Discussion

Sunday, March 6

When? 11:00 a.m. EST, which is 4:00 pm GMT. And I think its 9:00 pm in Pakistan

Where? Guided Discussion Room (Go to Chat -> Group Support -> Guided Discussion. This room will be opened a few minutes before the meeting starts.)

What? The workshop is envisioned as a weekly meeting to work on and closely discuss original poems by people in the 7 Cups Community. More information here.

The poems for discussion on March 6 are:

Sound of Silence by @Cheeney

Betrayal by @JoyCS

(untitled poem) by @persistentWillow4292

Farewells by @2genPoet

You can read them HERE.

@faithlove1111 @WarmCaramel26 @pureatheart25 @Sane12 @heartfulMusic18 @persistentWillow4292 AndrogynousPeach @raingirlpoet @Cheeney @SpeakFromtheHeart @PoeticGuy

Hi, The following is a poem that summarizes my exeperince with homeless life in a shelter.

Replies would mean a lot to me.

BROKE

Mere men in malignant mire

Here some fail to aspire,

Squander and Squalor with no place left to wander.

I drift in this melancholy

Stillness.

Ever depressed to be beneath the rest

Duplictious debts due them in.

Wreckage and Ruin play against the Karmatic melody.

Living in lament in this crowded torment.

Rules that flicker on and off and on oh ____ OFF!

Impoverished pieces of ____ who just don't get it....

Who just don't get it...

Cozy Catatonic Creeps, Does Insanity Ever Sleep?

Stir crazy, nerves fried, no food that feeds.

No showers that clean. Exhausting the empty.

Evil men, broken lives, some of them drained from treacherous wives.

Dope fiends with warped schemes

Frustrations we can't quell.

Machines on their death knell.

All of us losers dwell in

But, a slippery step above hell.

(redactions by forum mentor annie)

@King0fclubs

nice one

@LMessi10

Thank you very much! :D

@King0fclubs

Thank you for sharing this with us. Just wow, I can't imagine how people who live in homelessness feel nor struggle, but this poem really speaks to me. I hope you continue to write more.

@King0fclubs You can really feel the despair around you. Wonderfully written.

@intellectualKite3129

Thank you.

And thank you @JaceofSpades

I needed to hear that.

@King0fclubs, this is some powerful stuff! I admire the intensity of the message and also admire the technical merits that help generate the power. Some of my favorite parts are:

-- the alliteration here: Mere men in malignant mire
-- the assonance of the letter i plus the wonderful pause that occurs before stillness on a line by itself: I drift in this melancholy / Stillness.

-- internal rhymes like this one: Ever depressed to be beneath the rest

-- more alliteration, and a pun (do/due): Duplictious debts due them in.

-- alliteration and internal rhyme: Living in lament in this crowded torment.

-- the metaphor of rules not uniformly applied and the clever on-off-on-OFF: Rules that flicker on and off and on ... OFF

There is much more, but I particularly admire the final line, with the chilling image of being on "a slippery step above hell."

Bravo!

@King0fclubs, this is some powerful stuff! I admire the intensity of the message, and I also admire the technical merits that help generate the power. Some of my favorite parts are:

-- the alliteration: Mere men in malignant mire
-- the assonance of the letter i in these lines, plus the wonderful pause that occurs before stillness on a line by itself: I drift in this melancholy / Stillness.

-- internal rhymes like this one: Ever depressed to be beneath the rest

-- more alliteration, and a pun (do/due): Duplictious debts due them in.

-- alliteration and internal rhyme: Living in lament in this crowded torment.

-- the metaphor of rules not uniformly applied and the clever on-off-on-OFF: Rules that flicker on and off and on ... OFF

There is much more, but I particularly admire the final line, with the chilling image of being on "a slippery step above hell."

Bravo!

Poetry Writing and Anxiety

I know what to write because there is so many thoughts running in my mind!

Should I write something inspirational?

Or maybe I can make up something that's loving and kind?...

But I don't feel happy all the time...

Should I write a poem about how I'm really feeling inside?

Or should I go with the positive side of myself and push my other feelings aside?

What type of person do you want others to view you as?

Here is your chance to show them what you are made of...Don't fu*k it up!

You don't want to be that girl you was growing up...

After school feeling empty and lonely in her room feeling stuck.

What the heck?! I'm actually going into my past just because I'm trying to make up a poem from my brain...

But scared people might view it like "What the fu*k was she thinking? This sh*t is lame!"

Why am I putting so much thinking into this? It's just a poem your making up for fun.

Who cares what people think I ask myself now...

I care, because I don't want to hide myself anymore...

but I want to write something that people read and say "Wow!"

More like, Wow! Here I am taking this poetry writing too serious.

Now I'm questioning my sanity. Am I delirious???

This is taking longer than I expected just to make up a freaking simple poem of my own.

You know what? Forget this I am exhausted from my thoughts again im not surprised.

I'll just label this poem Anxiety so it will be known.

I know other people understands me and I'm not alone...

Dear @MzLexusLove, You're definitely not alone . . . Your poem will resonate with many, many people at 7 Cups. Thank you for sharing your poem!

Thank you sweetheart. @Annie

Hi,

I often feel a paradox of emotions and wrote this at a seemingly confused and restless time in my life.

Paradoxical

Sometimes,
Soaring above great horizons
And then sinking into hollows of depression
Often blazing through a myriad of emotions
Then gently drifting into dead numbness

All too full
And suddenly empty

Not contained inside
Or alive outside
I'm here because I have to
Drawn elsewhere, maybe I want to?
I don't know where I ought to be
Just a lost fish in the sea...
Is it You doing this to me?

@Esha222 This is beautiful and the message really resonates with me. I love the title too, Paradoxical

@Cheeney I'm glad..thank you so much :)

[Trigger warning - incest/rape]

A "Father's" Love

So small and innocent

Quite fragile, not grown.

Pitch black, so frightened.

No friends... All alone...

Knowing the danger,

Tough touch of a hand.

The "love" of a father?

Too much to stand.

"Stay there!"

"Be quiet!"

... "I love you,"

"Don't tell."

But daddy, it hurts!

"Please baby, don't yell."

I'm young and unwise...

So shocked- he lies?!

He left her there,

In sharp, harsh tone.

Broken and shattered,

Afraid of her home.

I'm right, it's wrong!

So go! ... So long...

Dear @HugLover22, I can only imagine what it took to write this poem. It is very strong, and terribly haunting. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Painfully, my eyes glare into nothing...

The endless darkness seems so vast.

Pitch black shadows, distantly casting glimpses of forms and shapes.

Sleep evades me. It taunts my every resting desire.

My mind then wanders... Naive and innocently, it stumbles upon the chained, forbidden, unknown.

Every memory exposed-

Every thought vulnerable.

Every "what if?" transformed into an illusion of reality...

The memories were purposefully forgotten--intentionally buried deep into the unaware subconscious.

It is only now, in the absence of sleep, when these memories begin to surface.

Quickly, they accumulate and merge into dangerous haunting realities.

These memories haunt every thought in my mind.

I'm burdened by my own suppression.

Logic surrenders.

Eluding my ability to differentiate between a tampered imaginations' delusions and a sensae and obvious explanation...

Silhouettes revealing overcasts of pitch black darkness, become warped in the dead of night.

Now, the mere thought of dozing off is an utmost concern!

To get a wink of shut eye would only be an invitation to manipulate a sleep deprived brain.

Imposition of these memories is my greatest fear.

@HugLover22, You've truly captured the swirling thoughts that can plague us when sleep eludes us -- wow.

@HugLover22 this is mad i love it ?? theres so much meaning behind every line like hnnnng and there are so many different ways to interpret it and it feels so?? like relateable like i can see myself in this

TRIGGER WARNING: SELF HARM

We all cry tears

and cut our pain.

The blood drips fast,

the scars remain...

We see a knife

and cut away.

The hope is here,

we love the pain.

Hold back the tears,

reject the pain.

Take ease in knowing,

you've pierced a vein.

Slam the door,

punch the ground.

They can't hear

when there's no sound.

Your fingers tremble

with glass in hand.

It cuts through skin,

like colored sand.

You watch your blood

run away

down your arm

just to say...

I'll stop one day,

it won't be hard.

Itnore the hurt,

they're only scars...

@HugLover22, This was difficult to read. I can imagine that it was difficult to write. (I find myself wondering whether the comments about it being easy to quit was meant ironically, that the narrator says it, but the reader knows it can be very hard to stop.)

I've been writing this poem for several days now and after numerous hours of brainstorming and polishing I'm finally happy about how it turned out ツ

Feel free to comment as I really want to receive feedback, especially critical one in order to develop.

Anxious

It's like a stranger broke into my mind
moving all my thoughts around

He doesn't care how I feel
How I kneel when he breaks me down
When he breaks me down

It's like the stranger broke into my pride
getting rid of my self-esteem

He doesn't care how I fret
How I sweat when he breaks me down
When he breaks me down

It's like a stranger broke into my sight
removing all my hope

He doesn't care how I cry
How I try when he breaks me down
When he breaks me down

This stranger's in my head
with a combat lead
How can I break him down?
How can I break him down?

@FaithForTheWin I love this. I imagine it would work well in a song too, your poem has great rhythm and a musical sound. You tell a great deal of emotion with your poem. You asked for critical feedback to improve, so here are some notes/tips. (I am in no way an expert, these are just some thoughts of mine. The beauty of poetry lies in its originality and imperfections, and you should always do what feels right to you. Everyone has different opinions about how to write poetry, there's no right or wrong way.)

The most common tip: show, don't tell. Meaning: don't say 'I saw a pretty flower' but instead say 'the flower radiated brighter than the sun as I glanced upon its lively petals'. Something like that creates an image in the reader's mind, which is crucial in any type of story telling. Descriptive language helps bring more detail to that image and fill in the blanks.

One thing I sometimes do is google synonyms for certain words. I'm not a native speaker and even if I were I probably wouldn't know/remember the exact word I'd be looking for, so google is a nice resource to help. For example, a synonym for ''getting rid of'' is to dispose of, or cast aside. It would fit well in your poem. That said, I appreciate simple language in poetry too, it makes it easy to read. And it's more about the message you portray through your poetry than the amount of fancy words you use. Whatever words you choose, either work well, as long as you use them consistently.

That's how I usually write, and it's neither the right nor the wrong way. The best thing you can do is just to mess around a bit, try different styles and different subjects to write about, eventually you'll find something that works for you and you're comfortable with.

@Cheeney Thank you very much for your detailed reply ^^
I really appreciate it!

Descriptive language that creates an image in the reader's mind is really important yet extremely difficutl in my opinio. I somehow still struggle to describe things instead of just saying 'I saw a pretty flower'. But I'll work on it.

Googling synonyms is interesting. I guess that will help a lot in future, thank you :)
As I am not a native speaker either I used to search for words that truly expressed what I want to say in German and then translated them into English, sometimes with the help of a dictionnary. But googlins synonyms seems to make a lot more sense as I can't 'get lost in translation' by accident.

Really thank you a lot for commenting!

@FaithForTheWin I'm glad I was able to help. What helps me is first creating the image in my own head. When I want to write about a flower, I imagine myself walking across a field and suddenly seeing a flower from the corner of my eye. Think about what immediately catches your eye when you first look at it, then imagine the little details you notice when you come closer. Ask yourself, what makes this flower more beautiful than any other flower. It could be the location, the colors or the smell. Or maybe it reminds you of something, a memory of a time where you were younger and more innocent, just like that flower.

I read an article once that was titled ''the rules of poetry''. It really wasn't anything special, just some tips that are easily forgotten, but the last line of the article still resonates with me. ''Now you know the rules, don't be afraid to break them.''

@FaithForTheWin, the metaphor of the stranger breaking into the mind and shoving things around - I love it!

@Annie Thank you for your comment

I'm glad you like the metaphor

A few days ago, @TaintedHaze posted these poems in another thread. I moved them here to avoid duplicative threads, and, more importantly, to give these poems more attention from the 7 Cups community.

What they never knew

I wish they knew how hard I was trying

sometimes I seemed distant and lazy

but I wish they knew it wasn't because I didn't want to get better

that I hid what I did so my pain wouldn't hurt them

I wish they knew I never meant to make them worry

that sometimes just waking up in the morning took all of my energy

I wish they knew how much their words had hurt me

It forced my true self to hide inside it's misery

But to this day my family still doesn't know

How every day I was fighting a silent war

Behind closed eyes and slammed shut doors

They still don't know the half of it

How I dreamed to be alone

In a world that turned against me

with no where to go

How misery loved me

I stopped dreaming long before

Please tell me why I don't dream anymore

Skin heals just fine,

but where are the stitches for our souls?

I've never felt whole

Fragile, cracked

Swirling thoughts from long ago

caused all the sorrow to dig my own hole

But the don't even know

they don't even know.

(Me) -ADL

@Annie

Thank you so much~

@TaintedHaze, I can relate to this poem. The line about "stitches for the soul" is awesome.