OUR ORIGINAL POETRY: Share It Here
Hello there everyone!
If you're reading this it means that you probably are quite fond of poetry and writing it to. This is a thread to post all and any poetry that you may have, be it happy, sad, angry or just silly. All styles are welcome (free verse, couplets, slam) and it would be great to have at least one poem up a day for all of us to enjoy together!!
Nocturne Soliloquy
Threats of foes await:
Threats I may can't handle.
But in the end the light is dead,
So darkness takes the battle.
Fights of foes may come:
Fights I may lose too.
But in the night the shadow's dead,
And seldom does it value.
And all the riks I've waited for
Taught me there is worthiness
On trying just to stand,
When we fret to death.
Oh, life puked out the rules
Of obstinated kings
Which thought there was spirit
In the deepest of the cruels.
Oh, which essence do we hold?
Outside the nameless worries
There's valenty in the holiness
That hides the weaks, indeed.
There is life eternity
In the value of our acts.
There is life eternity
Where we can't firmly stand.
And there is life prevalence
In the value of our thoughts
And in how do we spread them
And in how do we fight.
Threats of foes await:
Threats I may can't handle.
But in the end I know it well,
So I will take the battle.
Fights of foes may come:
Fights I may lose too.
But in the night those lessons learnt
Will cover well my armor.
Forgive my mistakes for a future
Of longlivedness of wisdom.
And grieve will walk away, I'm sure.
And we will live in peace.
Wow, @LivingTangerine312001, this is fascinating. Very innovative use of words! Two of the phrases I especially admire are "life puked out the rules" and "deepest of cruels."
Impact!
Have You Ever?
Have you ever love someone so much that it hurts you to speak of this person's name?
Have you ever see a future with someone who don't see the future with you?
Have you ever beg for the love of someone who don't love you?
Have you ever wish that you don't love someone so much that it hurts you to wish that?
Have you ever sleep in tears because you know there's no future between you too?
Have you ever wish that you never meet this person so you would never feel this pain?
But then have you ever want someone so much in your life that it's okay for you to feel the pain?
Have you ever?
Dear @Minyaa, these are universal questions that I feel sure will strike a chord with readers. The pain of lost love, or hopeless love, can be so intense that we question whether it is stupid to open up and become vulnerable.
Poets have wrestled with this question for centuries. Tennyson struggled terribly when his best friend died young. He questioned whether it is better to have loved deeply and then lost that love, or better to have never experienced a great love in the first place, if it opens one to the risk of horrible pain. (In Memoriam A.H.H.)
He addressed a similar question in The Lotus Eaters, asking whether it's worth it to have a full human life with all the pain & loss & troubles or whether it would be better to have no pain, no suffering, no hard exhausting work, even if it means dulled senses, dulled feelings, no deep joy, limited experiences, and no real connection with other people.
He initially wrote that it would be better to live a dull easy life of soft leisure, pleasure and safety -- but later he edited the poem to conclude that it would be better to go out into the hard world and live fully even if it means risk and suffering all too often.
John Keats dealt the similar issues of pain and whether the fullness of human experience is valuable enough to risk the intense pain of loss that comes with a human life lived with risk, fully. Like Tennyson, he describes the yearning to be free from intense suffering, even if it means living like characters frozen in a wedding painting where they'll never grow old, never get sick or die, never be betrayed -- and never lie in each other's arms.
@Annie yes indeed. This is the questions that hardly not encountered by people that as long as you loved you always have the possibility of questioning is it better to love or not love. I'm really happy that you gave me more to add more knowledge about tragic loves :) Thank you very much :)
A pleasure, @Minyaa !
Don't expect me to be happy for you when you find someone
Coz I won't
Just remember that you were the one that gave up on us
When I didn't
And never forget that I promised to love you till forever and a day
And I didn't break it
I won't lie to you and tell you that I don't want you to remember me forever
Coz I do
I want my thoughts to haunt you
When you sleep
I want you to remember me, and the love I showed you
I want you to remember the sacrifices I made for us
The things I gave up for us to be together
I hope that when you finally find her
The one that is better than me
There'll always be something missing
And you'll think about me then
I hope that when you finally realize it
I'll be long gone
Not dead, no I wouldn't want to die with a broken heart
I hope that I'll be happy
With someone that will love me much more than you did
I hope that I'll completely forget you
And the way that you broke my heart
Dear @peachBunny4371, I love the rhythms in this poem, with the alternating lines presenting short blunt denials, And the subject matter (sigh) about the suffering after a break-up. You make it so real . . . .
Thank you
To listen
Is to allow someone to exhale as the tears roll down their face.
Is to hear the notes before they become a song.
Is to gently say,
@8steplisten
Your poem really inspires me to keep up the work as a listener on here as you accurately describe what it means to actively listen to somebody
Especially the metaphor of "notes" is a nice way of thinking in my opinion
@FaithForTheWin
Yes, they could be notes of concern, confusion, anger, or happiness.
Dear @8steplisten, This is AMAZING, AWESOME -- OH, I want ALL the Listeners to see this moving litany of what it is to listen. I'm so struck by what you've written, I can't find good words to express it.
Except to say, thank you.
Tonight, Today
I'll stay awake tonight as I can't sleep.
The time has gotten slow and there's no ending here.
I'll stay away tonight as I need it:
To feel my eyes again after watching you leave.
You said a lot of things I must decode.
But it's too late now to burn.
The sun gets cold, it freezes in me.
There is no reason why to stand this grieve.
I must have told the demons to go,
To let you in peace and make you stay.
You said a lot of things I will ignore,
As I don't want to die today.
I keep trying to reply, but the system keeps showing an old comment, no matter what I type. Weird! I think it's because I'm doing some beta testing for the Iphone app upgrade.
If I get on my laptop, I think i'll be able to post again!
Dear @LivingTangerine312001, I read this poem several times trying to figure out why I like the rhythm so much! And I think it's the recurrence of iambic meter.
(Ill explain a bit because not all schools teach about rhythm patterns like iambic, dactylic, trochaic, and so forth. The excerpts below are in ambic meter, a two-syllable pattern with the accent on the second syllable)
I'll stay a wake to night as I can't sleep.
The time has gotten slow and there's no ending here
I'll stay a wake to night To feel my eyes a gain
You said a lot of things I must decode but it's too late.
But there's no reason why to stand this grief.
I must have told the demons
to let you go in peace and make you stay
You said a lot of things I will ignore As I don't want to die to day.
Also, I like the interesting rhymes as well! In addition, the subject matter is intriguing, although I admit I dont yet understand a lot of it. (which is a good thing btw!)
Very beautiful.
Mama says you're pretty girl. You're my angel, my baby, my star, my world. But if this is true mama if this is fact, then why do you say such hurtful comments to me? How can you do me like that? You look like a slut in that dress. Those yoga pants say that you want much more, and if you leave my house looking like that everyone will think that you're just another loose girl.
But why should I care mama? Why should what they think matter? Because nothing hurts me more, than to hear you point out that my thighs have gotten fatter or that being a sexual person makes me a bad daughter. I'm either your little good girl, or that slut who likes it rough. But when I plead in opposition, you say girl you need to calm down and listen.
You're just a little too tough. You need to smile just a tad bit more, but not too much because then you'll look like a whore. I can either eat too much, or not enough. I'm too thin or too thick, too fat or too skinny. But Mama why can't you hear me? I have a woman's body and I will not apologize for that. It's the body that you passed down to me, so how can you shame me like that? These thick thighs, these full lips,these killer curves, these bodacious hips, you're the one who bless these gifts upon me. So how can you say the ugly things that you do about my body?
These questions are not out of spite for you either contempt or disdain. I just wish that you would take the time to contemplate the word you're always saying, because I can't spend another day listening to your internalized hate. For years and years I've tried not to let it bother me, but I can't anymore because women need to learn to live in harmony. Divide and Conquer. That's how they keep us down, that's how they hold us back. They make you feel shameful for the skin that you're in, and see to it that we pass it onto the next of kin.
But that's got to stop mama. We can't be about that life anymore. I just want to love my body, be a sexual being and know that you won't see me is just another whore. That you'll still be able to think positively, that you'll be able to see me for more than just my body. Mama you say I'm a pretty girl. I'm your angel, your baby, your star, your world. But if this is true mama is this is fact I need you to stop saying the hurtful things you say to me.
I need you to have my back.
Dear @MeteorShower, This is a remarkable piece of writing! For me, it feels more like prose than poetry, but I'm thrilled you posted it here for us to share.
This piece definitely struck a chord with me. My mom was also very critical of her daughters. She worked hard to be a good mother, keeping a spotless house and making sure we always had clean sheets and good meals. (which counts for a LOT, I know)
But she was a relentless perfectionist and extremely critical of herself and us. She seemed unable to appreciate our good behavior and good traits because our flaws captured her attention so powerfully, and she wanted badly for us to be better and more perfect.
I think parents yearn for their children to look "right" and and be "right" and don't realize that it's much better to be loved, expressly and explicitly praised. A lot. Confidence and self-esteem on th inside are so much more important than external compliance with society's ideal!
Your message to your mom captures, in a moving and compassionate way, the sad mistake that parents often make in trying to guide us in our development -- and the damage they can do unintentionally. Well done. Thank you so much for sharing this.
Short and Sweet
Butter is sweet
Ice cream is sweet
Beauty is sweet
Isn't love the sweetest?
@seemsame, definitely short and sweet. :)
And I think the wonderful thing is that beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder, and sweet love makes us all beautiful.
Silent warriors
Word for word we write
Pen as a weapon and paper as armor
Silent warriors of the night
But who are we fighting for
Are we following our hopes, our dreams?
Maybe this path is not ours to walk
Every waiting second spent is an attack on our self-esteem
Keeping ourselves occupied with empty smalltalk
With people we hardly know
Always waiting for inspiration to hit us
Whilst time passes so horribly slow
People wonder why we make such a big fuss
Over the things we can't control
I'll tell you the answer
It's because we love what we do with all our heart and soul
Much like how music is magic to a dancer
How colors reflect emotion to painters
Writing makes us whole
Even though we may be complainers
And we have difficulty fulfilling our role
When the struggle is past time
We will look up with a smile on our face
Saying 'Yes, I am just fine'
Greeting you with a warm embrace
Thank you for bearing with us
In our battles with our minds
Sorry for being a gloomy gus
You have been a hero of all kinds
@Cheeney, this is wonderful -- there's so much I like about it.
I admit I prefer the strong opening lines more than the apologetic part that follows. (To me sharing a disappointment or describing a wound is not being a complainer or a gloomy gus. That's one of the things I love about 7 Cups: a person can share their sorrows and lean on a willing listener without any fear of being a burden on someone. There is nothing to apologize for!!)
I give a huge YES to the concept that Writing makes us whole. And I love the idea that, when the struggle is past, we can look up with a smile.
@Annie Thank you so much! Yes, that's what I love about 7cups too. To be honest, a big part of why I put ''sorry for being a gloomy gus'' in there was that I needed something to rhyme with ''us''. And well, I often am a gloomy gus, so I thought it'd be appropriate. But what you said really resonates with me and I agree 100%. Thank you for your words :)
@Cheeney, thanks for explaining some of the artistic choices. Very interesting. I remember (back in the day when I wrote some poetry) dealing with the tyranny of a rhyme scheme! It can be perplexing to hit on a phrase that works well for the rhythm, rhyme, meaning, and toneI I think that's one of the things that makes poetry so intense, the search for the apt word that chimes perfectly on several levels. And when we find it - we have a taste of bliss. (Or at least strong relief!! )
@Annie Yes definitely - rhyming is fun though also a huge challenge. Normally I don't rhyme a lot so I had trouble finding my way around the block, but I got there and it was fun, I will do it again. That sparked my interest, have you still got some of the poems you wrote? I'd very much like to read some if you let me :)
@Cheeney, gosh it's been decades since I wrote any poetry worth reading!
In my teens and 20s, there was so much energy and pain and intensity that needed to burst out somehow, and it came out in poetry at times. However, as I've gotten older (and healthier and more relaxed, etc.), I find I just don't have anything deep inside that's aching to come out. Seriously, contentment has its downside, lol. Plus I spent 30 years as a technical prose writer, so that seemed to slake most of the thirst for writing!
@Annie I understand. Haha yeah I'd say contentment definitely has downsides, especially when it comes to writing or another art form. Negative emotions, cruel as they may be, provide great inspiration.
Why does a poem have to be about sex, or love, or mystical beings, or hopes, or dreams, or even leaves?
Why can't it just be about fish?
With pretty scales and swishy tales, why shouldn't it be about fish?
Dr Suess had the right idea, the perfect poem for this time of year, small and catchy and rather lovingly written about fish.
Fortitude, the bird that flew
Where he goes he never knew
The weather today was fine and sweet
And yet the bird, he could not eat
Wings are bent and beak is broke
Here's a warning, please don't choke
@Rainfall1308 Nice rhythm! But that poor bird :(
@Rainfall1308 -- I agree about Fish!
I think that intense emotions of love and loss often spill out in poetry, and strong confusion and pain can be a good source of inspiration. And it's very cool that even horrible wounds can result in beautiful poems, with art and creativity triumphing over the difficulty of human experience.
Nonetheless, I adore playful poems about fish. (As well as delightful ditties about frogs, and light limericks about grasshoppers.) More, please!
This is...well...not exactly poetry, but I felt the need to give a huge shout-out to @Annie who shows an exceptional capacity for kindness and constructive criticism. I can only say that this thread would be a very gloomy place without her positive presence.
Thanks for encouraging and supporting this little poetic bubble!
@NataliaNectarine
I am in awe of @Annie too, she is an incredible person and I am so grateful that she is here. ❤ This whole site would be gloomier without her compassionate and uplifting presence.
Dear @NataliaNectarine and @Lyra, Oh, my -- your kind words -- I'm gobsmacked and ridiculously pleased. Thank you! Y'all are wonderful.
I love this thread.