Fake
I knew it was fake.
I just didn't want it to be.
I knew when you would hold me close and whisper, like ripples on a lake
He was so awful to me, love, all he wanted was to take.
You are everything I want to see, undoing my mistake.
I knew when you came crashing down, rising in me like a quake
When you woke the blood within my veins to scream out at the ache
Your demons have no power here my love, don't you see?
Together we are strong, together we are free.
I knew that you would claw and tear, leave rawness in your wake
I knew that you would draw the breathe from me like a piercing stake
Like a gnawing, roiling hunger taking human shape
I wish you could know yourself as I do, love, I wish that you could see.
You are wise, kind and caring. You are the missing piece.
I knew then that I was yours. Forever and to keep
I knew then my heart was promised, for only you it beat
I knew then to tell the darkness, go and you can sleep
Do you ever wonder, love, have we left it all behind?
Are the things we left unspoken come to make us blind?
I was left to wonder, then, to wander in the dark
My demons had come knocking, stripping at my bark
Snapping at my limbs like twigs, no perch for the lark
I think I have to go back, love, to see it for myself.
To see if what I left behind is really all that's left.
You see you thought I came for you, to take you from this place.
But I have darkness in me too, it quickens in its pace.
So please be strong, and please be brave, and please do not forget.
I can't lay here with you anymore, and linger with regret.
So now I sit here with my demons, laughing all along
We’d had an inkling didn't we? Lost amung the throng
Then a quiet utterance from inside, thunder on a gong
I knew it was fake.
I just didn't want it to be.
@Dingleboop
So many deep thoughts aligned gracefully. It's thoughtful go read your poem, Dingleboop
@Dingleboop
Wow.
Reading this felt like stepping into a whirlwind of emotions, especially with the black-pink chrome- coded dialogues. I particularly like this repeated line, "I knew it was fake. I just didn't want it to be." It feels like something I’ve felt at some point too, knowing something isn’t right, yet wanting to hold onto it so badly because the idea of letting go is too painful. That line just hit home.
Your skills with imagery and emotional depth is phenomenal. A beautiful piece.
@ZenArashi
🥹🥹 Thank you Zen, you are too kind.
@Dingleboop
You’re most welcome. 😊
Eh I wanna write chroma instead of chrome 🤦🏻♀️ ah well…
I resonate with this so much, this is amazing, I'm at awe with how you write
@Dingleboop
I like how you have woven the narrative in such a way to make it seem so imperative. The repeated rhyme scheme helps give each line emphasis, as if you are stating it like a mantra. Almost as if you are trying to convince yourself: The themes of hindsight, awareness, wishful thinking and deliberate denial are made all the more convincing by your chosen rhyme style.
The poem seems to highlight the difficulties of an uneven love, as it seems that the narrator has all the 'demons' and is the victim of the relationships failings, and yet seems to elevate the subject on a pedestal. There is something very relatable about it's tone; the desire to give oneself wholly and utterly into the thrall of another for the sake of love no matter the cost.
A really good poem indeed. Thank you for sharing it with us.
@BastionKnight
I don't know what to say, Im honoured you even read this, let alone commented. Thank you..
Yes. I'm not subtle in my writing that's for sure; definitely not one to bury the lead. Thank you for commenting, thank you for comprehending, internalizing, it means more to me than you know.
@Dingleboop This is stunning—haunting and rhythmic, like the push and pull of a tide. The repetition of "I knew" gives the poem a steady rhythm, almost like a heartbeat, making the emotions feel inevitable. The contrast between love and destruction is striking—there’s this push and pull between wanting to believe and knowing the truth. I really liked the imagery of hunger taking human shape and the demons stripping away at the speaker’s bark—it makes the pain feel raw and tangible. And the way it circles back to the first lines at the end?- " I knew it was fake /But I just couldn’t admit it". That shift—from denial to resignation—hits hard. That lands perfectly, like a quite realization settling in. I loved the addition of the colour too – it really brings another layer to the piece, adding depth to the emotions. Really well done.
@azurePond Ahh...... I just noticed it after posting! Meant quiet realization, not quite—sorry about that!
Truly a beautiful poem. You eloquently expressed the chaos of a difficult connection with someone. Also, you maintaining the rhythm by continuing the rhyme is very well done. I know when I write I feel like every ryhming word hides out of sight in all the inconspicuous corners of my mind.