Struggling (tw: SI, SH, Substance Abuse)

I got out of a facility almost two months ago for mental and substance disorders. I haven’t really felt like using but I have been engaging in self harm and having some strong suicidal thoughts. Im no longer living life and im back to just trying to find ways to keep going. I feel like im running out of options as the only people in my life that “care” just don’t *** care at all. I don’t feel loved or cared about and if no one cares about me why should I give a *** about myself. I guess im just unlovable. Good things last around an 1/8th of the time the others I just feel like I’m dead. I’m tired of it all.