When is it Okay to Say You're Not Okay?
***Word of warning: may trigger***
I'm living on a borderline, between life and death it seems, with borderline personality disorder and depression. My emotions are all over the place. It's been difficult to get out ofe bed, or to do anything really. I've been engaging in self-injurious behaviour on a regular basis. I've abused my antidepressants to the point of serotonin toxicity. My thoughts lately have been... irrational and dangerous.
Needless to say, I'm not okay.
But is it okay to admit that I'm not okay? How can I tell someone, without scaring them off? I have such a need to tell someone, to really talk about this... but I can't. It's like my mouth is sewed shut with barbed wire. So I continue this slow but steady descent into darker waters. I feel like I'm drowning.
Is it okay to tell someone I'm not okay? That I'm struggling so severely? That I'm afraid of my own mind? I walk a thin line at the moment. And I want to speak up. But I lost my voice.