BPD

My name is Ashton, I'm 20 years old and I was diagnosed with Borderline when I was 14. I know it is unusual for adolescent patients to be diagnosed with this disorder but my symptoms were so profound that it wasn't difficult to diagnose. I also suffer from PTSD. My most common symptom is severe mood swings, fear of abandonment, and intense emotional personality. My emotional pain is exponentially worse than what a normal person would experience. It's a daily battle of self worth and fighting the urges of engaging in risky behaviors like self harm or self medicating. I used to self harm but have been clean for a year. I experience urges to medicate but I never have in my life. Both my mother and my father had/has BPD. My father is currently alive but my mother committed suicide 6 and a half years ago. I struggle with negative thoughts and severe anxiety/paranoia and a constant fear of crisis. And sometimes it becomes too much and I my anger explodes and I eventually push my friends and family away because I am afraid I am only going to keep hurting them. I just moved out from an abusive roommate and my anxiety is at its all time high and my flashbacks have been occurring more. My new roommate also has BPD and PTSD and I am scared I will hurt him because of my emotional sensitivity will cause my anger to be taken out on him. He does the same to me as well. How do I cope with this disorder?