Personality Disorders Support Forum

Info

6,919 Friends

Filter by Topic

Antisocial & Histrionic Personality Disorders Avoidant, Dependent, and Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorders Borderline Personality Disorder Narcissistic Personality Disorder Paranoid, Schizoid, and Schizotypal Personality Disorders Personality Disorders Support Check-in Resources

Community calendar

Group chat

Ask questions, get support and make friends

Find a group chat

Quick links

About Us

Get Started

Online Therapy

Terms

My communities

Discover more

Considering Therapy?

Talk to an expert therapist

New subscribers

@Einfachpatrik

Create a New Thread

Gif Photo Link

Personality Disorders Support Community Taglist

by theriverissinging

November 22nd

...See more This thread controls an auto-updating taglist. To see the current list, go to Personality Disorders Support Community Taglist [https://rarelycharlie.github.io/taglist?94a32be95048a6df06c721790c5ddca1]. To add yourself to this taglist, press the Reply button in this post and write the exact words “Please add me.” To remove yourself from this taglist, press the Reply button in this post and write the exact words, “Please remove me.” Taglist to be used for check-ins, discussions, events and announcements. Taglist as of Nov 2024 @Adeline12345 @AlfAndthemachine @alleywood13 @Alwaysinpyjamas @ambitiousVase1322 @amicableDime9946 @AndreaDawn @arbanon @ARC80 @AspenCade @AutumnLauren6 @autumnthemoth @Avocado22 @azuladragon34 @b4Damion @BaggageClaim @berrymimi @bestcase @Blue123456618 @blueAngel00 @caringPerspective41 @CheerySandi @ChristmasGift @courageousPond1835 @crang17 @crimsonPlane2738 @cyanPlatypus6370 @dagaz13th @DamagedOne13 @daydreammemories @dberryy @diamondintheROUGH2022 @DIDisaythat @DoggoMom @ebonyyyblondie89 @EddaLayla @emerijourney @EmmaSwan18 @EmotionalNerd @Everythingisbetterinyourpyjamas @fearlessOcean2254 @fearlessSouth4632 @fireyseastar97 @FloweringBunny @forcefulFriend4768 @FreakFactor7 @generousEyes493 @Glue @Goldcherry2113 @GRAPSPRO2033 @GreenScarab @Hadeel96 @HashiramaNinja @Healing0Pillow @healingHeart1111 @heartycitrus @HopeandFaith @Hyacinth22 @IdolPigment @ImaginativePenny152 @imclover @indigoCup1959 @intelligentWheel627 @Irishrose78 @itsmeow @Jasminerice @Jish07541 @JoniGirl @Jupiterbeingahuman @JusticiaPrimalDorogo @JustSophia @K87 @kindTurtle3738 @LabeledBPD @LadyNikita @LavenderFlower @learningtolovemyself @Lemino @LightsFromDark @Lilac4Roses @LiliTwolsky @limeRaspberries2286 @lovelyWords13 @LoveTracker @maple23 @MeeshyRB @MelG919 @missg @Mkmultra @munchiegoosie @nervoussmiles @NightshadeVenom @Nubia87 @OneErased @optimisticMagic0014 @OrangePeel24 @Oxymoron6demon @passionateJackfruit5095 @Piggy @placidShade4261 @Pointlesswords @Psalm139 @QueenBee03 @QueenSerenity5 @QuietMagic @racqueldawn @raininglillies13 @raspberryWatermelon7195 @rationalGrapefruitq @Red789 @RelaxedPanda @RemorseCode2 @Rex0911 @RoadLessTraveled @runaway101 @SadBlueEyes @selfdisciplinedBunny232 @ShyCat1678201 @SilverSeastar @Sleepwalkermw @spectacularCandy9984 @Stardew3 @Starilus @StrangeKat @sunflower2480 @Tamy4210 @Tatianaalize @tohealthemoon @toucans @Triscups @Twigo7 @uniqueRose1689 @versatilePomegranate60 @WalkingCrow @witchyyrose @Xe @xmoonsie16x0 @YourCaringConfidant

Personality Disorders Support Community Navigation

How do I not become an abusive narcissist?

by AlJoTu

1 day ago

involuntary age regression

by kaydormae99

November 20th

Do you have go-to routines you do when you are starting to spiral?

Looking for bpd people

by Lovebubble

October 20th

Less-Symptoms of BPD (Part 3) 💖🌷

by crypticwhisperss1

September 19th

...See more Hello, everyone! Now that we've discussed the types of BPD, it's time to have an overview of the uncommon symptoms that are experienced by some people with the disorder. This is a fascinating topic that I am excited to introduce, especially that it is based on research and factual evidence. 🤩 These symptoms include: ↬ Pervasive Shame: As defined by John Bradshaw, "Toxic shame is experienced as the all-pervasive sense that I am flawed and defective as a human being. It is a state of being, a core identity. Toxic shame gives you a sense of worthlessness, the feeling of being isolated, empty, and alone." This deep, internalized shame can profoundly impact a person's sense of self-worth and ability to maintain healthy relationships. ↬ Undefined Boundaries: Someone with BPD might say, "I was brought up thinking that the perfect intimate relationship had no boundaries. Boundaries only meant a rift between people. Boundaries meant I had to be alone, separate, and have an identity. I didn't feel good enough to have a separate identity. I needed either total enmeshment or total isolation." This black-and-white thinking around relationships can make it very difficult for those with the disorder to establish appropriate emotional and physical boundaries. ↬ Control Issues: People with this condition may need to feel in control of other people because they feel out of control with themselves. They may try to make their own world more predictable and manageable. This desire for control often stems from deep-seated fears of abandonment and a lack of inner stability. ↬ Lack of Object Constancy: This is a significant symptom that is often discussed but did not make it into the DSM. When we feel lonely, we can soothe ourselves by remembering the love that others have for us. However, individuals with BPD find it difficult to evoke an image of a loved one when they feel upset or anxious. If that person is not physically present, they just don't exist on an emotional level. This is why the person with BPD may call their loved ones frequently just to make sure they still care about them. The inability to maintain an internalized sense of connection with others can be incredibly distressing. ↬ Interpersonal Sensitivity: It has been observed that borderline individuals are adept at reading other people and uncovering their triggers and vulnerabilities. This may be because they learned to carefully read the cues of people around them, or because they rely on others for their emotional stability. Some findings suggest BPD traits that might enhance the ability to detect mental states and subtle facial expressions of others, but that's not always true. Other studies have shown that people with BPD have higher error rates for recognition of emotionally expressive faces compared to healthy control. However, they display higher accuracy in detecting fearful faces. It all depends on the specific context and individual differences among those with the disorder. ↬ Situational Competence: Some people with BPD appear non-disordered at work and perform very well, even being high achievers, while others find it arduous to hold a job. Marsha Linehan, an American psychologist and author, calls this "situational competence." ↬ Narcissistic Demands: This is quite different from being a narcissist, which is a different case. This refers to the fact that some people frequently bring the focus of attention back to themselves. They may react to things based solely on how it affects them. However, drawing the attention to themselves does NOT mean that people with BPD lack empathy. It is likely correlated with overwhelming emotions that can make it difficult to focus on the emotional well-beings of others. For example, a child in a grocery store craving a cookie may be very compassionate and make friends with all the lonely children at school. But in the moment of wanting the cookie, they are not going to care about their father's feelings. They might throw a tantrum and saying hurtful words in order to get the cookie. This does not indicate that people with BPD are dramatic or uncaring by nature. Rather, it suggests that in the grip of strong emotions, their focus can narrow and their ability to consider others' perspectives becomes compromised. References: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8354944/ https://www.apa.org/monitor/dec06/bpd https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/matter-personality/202206/borderline-personality-are-they-bad-reading-others ------------------------- I truly hope this post has helped to emphasize on the more complex and uncommon aspects of borderline personality disorder. A lot of these characteristics aren't yet included in the official diagnostic criteria. There remains a lot of debate and nuance around how these behaviors truly manifest in people with BPD. However, I believe that it's important that we keep educating ourselves and staying up-to-date on the revolving research and perspectives. Although these traits are unofficial, they can contribute to additional stigma and misunderstanding that those with BPD already face. Our role should be to approach this with empathy, spread awareness, and try to see the heartfelt humanity and inherent beauty behind the immense turmoil that borderline individuals experience. So, what do you think about this post? I'd be really curious to hear your perspectives! Thank you for your time, and take care! 💛🌻 ~ Xaverie ♡

Trying to take responsibility of how I react/or do not react when my wife is having a really hard time

BPD Subtypes (Part 2 of Spreading Awareness) 😊🧡

by crypticwhisperss1

July 10th

...See more Welcome to the second part of our BPD awareness series! In the previous post, we discussed the definition and symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder. Now, let's explore the different subtypes of this condition! 💛 The first thing you need to know is that BPD encompasses a range of presentations, with 256 possible combinations and 4 distinct subtypes. They include Discouraged/Quiet Borderline, Impulsive Borderline, Petulant Borderline, and Self-Destructive Borderline. These subtypes are NOT officially recognized in the DSM-5, which is the standard classification system for mental disorders. So, while they offer insights into the diverse manifestations of BPD, they are not part of the formal diagnostic criteria outlined in the DSM-5. This means that if you ever end up being diagnosed with BPD, you won't receive a specific subtype diagnosis but rather be diagnosed with the general form of BPD itself. 1) Discouraged/Quiet BPD: It is often associated with a pervasive sense of emptiness, low self-esteem, and a fear of abandonment. Individuals with this subtype may experience chronic feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and helplessness, which may lead to struggles with self-sabotaging behaviors as coping mechanisms. In relationships, they may exhibit dependency, an intense need for reassurance, and challenges in setting boundaries. They might seek validation to ease their fear of rejection and abandonment. Moreover, they often internalize their feelings or suppress their anger, which can result in a calm outward appearance. This internalization of emotions can make it challenging to recognize their underlying struggles, which often leads to misdiagnosis or a lack of diagnosis because they may not exhibit the stereotypical symptoms of BPD. It is important to note that there is a myth surrounding this subtype that suggests it is high-functioning. This is NOT accurate because people who have it face significant emotional challenges and may not necessarily exhibit high functionality in all aspects of their lives. 2) Impulsive BPD: It is characterized by impulsive and self-destructive behaviors. People with this subtype struggle with difficulties in impulse control, often engaging in reckless behaviors like excessive spending or risky encounters. They have a tendency to act on their intense emotions without considering the consequences, which can lead to frequent conflicts and unstable relationships. Additionally, they may experience intense mood swings and show heightened sensitivity to perceived rejection, resulting in emotional reactivity and outbursts of anger. 3) Petulant BPD: It is characterized by chronic feelings of anger, resentment, and a tendency towards passive-aggressive behavior. Those with this subtype often have a strong need for control and may display stubbornness, irritability, and defiance. They may even struggle with feelings of victimization and tend to blame others for their problems. In relationships, a petulant borderline may engage in power struggles, manipulation, and a difficulty in expressing vulnerability. They may use indirectly hostile tactics to express their anger and maintain a sense of control. TW! ⚠ 4) Self-Destructive BPD: It is characterized by self-injury behaviors, despairing tendencies, and a deep sense of self-loathing. People with this subtype often experience intense feelings of shame, guilt, and a distorted self-image. They may engage in self-destructive behaviors to cope with emotional pain or to gain a sense of control over their internal turmoil. In relationships, they may display a pattern of pushing others away due to their fear of abandonment, which can further contribute to their isolation and despair. ------------------------- Soo.. How can you summarize the subtypes? (Not limited to only these!) Discouraged/Quiet Borderline: ❖ Hypersensitive to rejection and criticism ❖ Tends to be withdrawn, passive, and avoidant of conflict ❖ Experiences persistent feelings of emptiness and hopelessness ❖ Prone to depressive episodes and low self-esteem ⚠⚠ ❖ May engage in self-injury as a coping mechanism Impulsive Borderline: ❖ Struggles with intense, rapidly shifting emotions ❖ Engages in impulsive behaviors and craving connection ❖ Emotional outbursts and difficulty controlling anger ❖ May lean towards addictive tendencies ❖ Can have a distorted, unstable sense of self Petulant Borderline: ❖ Chronically angry, argumentative, and resistant to authority ❖ Feels entitled and becomes easily frustrated when needs aren't met ❖ Oscillates between neediness and hostility in relationships ❖ Can be manipulative and verbally harsh towards others ❖ Resents and rebels against those they perceive as controlling Self-Destructive Borderline: ❖ Experiences profound feelings of emptiness and worthlessness ⚠⚠ ❖ Engages in self-injury and harmful behaviors ❖ Distorted body image and disordered eating patterns ❖ Prone to dissociative episodes as a coping mechanism ❖ Withdraws from social support and isolates themselves ------------------------- Q: Is it possible to relate to more than one subtype of BPD? Absolutely! It is very common for people with the disorder to relate to characteristics of more than one subtype. Many of them find that they exhibit traits across multiple stereotypes, either concurrently or at different points in time. The emotional, behavioral, and interpersonal patterns associated with BPD can shift and evolve, so your dominant symptoms may change over the course of your life! For example, you may start off identifying more strongly with the impulsive subtype. But over time, as you work on coping strategies, you may find yourself relating more to the discouraged/quiet subtype, struggling more with feelings of emptiness and self-loathing. That is completely valid! After all, the subtypes are not meant to be rigidly exclusive. They just show the reality that BPD can indeed be complex and fluid! ------------------------- NOTE: I just want to make it crystal clear—I don't way intend to categorize or stereotype people with BPD. My goal here is to solely raise awareness and understanding about ways that the disorder can present, not to make sweeping generalizations about folks living with it. I would never want to make anyone feel induced to a label or a checklist of traits. That goes against everything I believe in. 💚💚 At the end of the day, people with BPD are human beings deserving of empathy, respect, and compassion - not judgment or assumptions. They are no different than anyone else struggling with mental health challenges. They deserve to be seen and understood as whole, multifaceted people, not pigeonholed into narrow categories. To all people with BPD, your condition is completely valid. You are so strong! I am here for you!! 🤗💗 ------------------------- Time for an icebreaker! 😮 If you could choose one superpower that would help you manage the challenges associated with your BPD "subtype" (or the one you most relate to), what would it be and why? Would the Impulsive Borderline want super speed to slow down their impulses? Would the Petulant Borderline choose mind-reading to better understand others' perspectives? Get creative in the comments below! 💙✨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Thank you for reading, and have a nice day! 🌸 ~ Xaverie ♡

Welcome to the Personality Disorders Support Community. Click on the "Resources" tab below to find a list of forum subsections for each personality disorder. Sign up for updates using the Taglist. To find upcoming events: Use the Community Calendar (Ctrl+F "Personality disorders").

Community Guidelines

Hello Personality Disorders Subcommunity.

Our priority is making this a safe space for those who have personality disorders.

Please help us create and maintain a supportive and safe environment, by following these guidelines:
Note: Underlined texts are clickable links.

Please be respectful of others and their opinions, even if you disagree with them. Avoid conflict or arguments. If something occurs that feels disrespectful, please send a message HERE with a link.
Please don't use moving GIFs or extremely bright colors out of respect for our users with hypersensitivity. Static images and text with neutral colors are okay.
Please let the subcommunity team know if you need anything. Let us know what works for you and what doesn't. Share any ideas you have that would make this an even more supportive place for you.

Guidelines on Trauma and Abuse related content.
Please use the Trauma Support Subcommunity as it is more fitting to get support for abuse related issues.
Please add a TW (trigger warning) mention at the beginning of posts where a potential triggering topic is addressed. Examples of potential triggering topics are abuse (in any form: emotional, physical, sexual, etc.) and self-destructive behaviours (for instance, self-harm).
We do not condone the use of the term “Narcissistic Abuse” please replace it with “Emotional/Financial/Physical/Sexual Abuse” instead.

Guidelines on Family and Relationship Issues.

Please use the Family and Caregivers Subcommunity for family issues as they are able to provide you with more fitting support.
Please use the Relationship Support Subcommunity for relationship issues as they are able to provide you with more fitting support.
If there is a thread with a generalization or stereotype in it about those with Personality Disorders, it will be:
1) Edited in lieu with the following guidelines.
2) Deleted if they cannot be edited.

Threads where support is required for family or relationship issues with a PD will be moved to Trauma Support, Family and Caregivers or Relationship support subcommunity where it best fits.
Supportive or neutral threads like “How do I support my partner with PD” can remain in their respective forum sections.
Discussing personal issues like “My partner has NPD and it’s really difficult to cope with their diagnosis”, communication issues, stigma and other such issues are allowed in their respective forum sections.

Please be mindful of how your words may affect people with personality disorders. Avoid using language or labels in a way that is stigmatizing, stereotyping, invalidating, or generalizing. Explained in depth below:

General guidelines to be inclusive:

Use people-first language, such as “person with personality disorder” or “individual with personality disorder”
Be ethically responsible and mindful of how your post impacts people with personality disorders.
Do not label individuals and don’t use labels in a derogatory way or with a prerogative meaning.
Avoid phrases and language that excludes people with personality disorders or place them into an outgroup. Example: “These people with Personality Disorders” or “They who have Personality Disorders”. Please instead use “Those with Personality Disorders” or simply “People with Personality Disorders”

Guidelines to follow when explaining a personality disorder:

People often borrow from psychological texts to explain what they perceive to be a personality disorder.

Reminder:

A psychologist or psychiatrist is a trained professional and their activity of segregating types, symptoms, severity of disorders, etc. is conducted from a diagnostic perspective.

Issue 1.

We are not trained individuals. While we may try to offer helpful information, those descriptions can be disparaging to people with personality disorders.

Issue 2.

Oftentimes when such distinctions are explained by people who do not have lived experience with personality disorders, these distinctions portray people with personality disorders in a negative light.

❌Please do not:

Promote labelling individuals, especially based on perceived differences; it is not helpful and only an individual can label themselves.
Cater content towards those who are not people with personality disorders, with an intent to defame, malign or slander people with personality disorders.
Promote stereotypical images of what individuals with personality disorders are like.
Promote unhealthy standards of behavior for people with personality disorders.
Invalidate the lived experiences of people with personality disorders.
Promote stigmas and prejudices associated with personality disorders.

✅You can however:

Critically represent data or engage in supportive discussions on psychological texts which are from credible sources and catered towards the benefit of people with personality disorders.
Raise issues in a supportive way, promote self care, share coping mechanisms, start a conversation or share personal experiences.

Hence when threads conflict with the personal wellbeing or interests or an individual with personality disorders, these posts/threads will be corrected or deleted, under the following guidelines.

Unsupportive content including targeting or attacking other users in the community is not allowed. Disagreements may happen, but always maintain a respectful tone and try to move the conversation forward in an on-topic and constructive way. Sometimes this means agreeing to disagree. Click here for expanded guideline post
In order to maintain a therapeutic space, we delete forum posts that take away from a supportive forum environment. If a forum post is not helpful, nor positive, then it will be deleted. Click here for expanded guideline post

Guidelines to follow when explaining symptoms of personality disorders:

The line between what is a descriptive symptom and what is stereotypical can be very thin. Hence we are sharing some rules of thumb to explain how you can stray away from generalizations and stay supportive.

❌Please do not:

Describe someone from perceived actions or behavior.
Assume or assert the personal motivations of an individual.
Use emotive descriptive words which attribute malicious intent to the experience of a person with personality disorders.

✅You can however:

Highlight the internal experience of the individual.
Identify that these symptoms are on a spectrum.
Explain critically the experiences of the individual who has these symptoms from their perspective.
Use emotive words which describe how a person with personality disorder feels.

When a thread does not follow the above guidelines and portrays any symptoms or individuals with personality disorders as abusers or in a negative light, they will be corrected or deleted under the following guideline:

3. Inflammatory, racist, sexist, offensive, homophobic, transphobic, etc. posts are not allowed. Posting about the impacts of abuse, racism, sexism, etc. or seeking support on these topics is allowed. Click here for expanded guideline post

If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

Note to Forum Leaders:
Appropriate action: If at all possible, the forum moderator should remove the unsupportive content while retaining the post. All edits should include the forum moderator’s name and the reason for editing (e.g. unsupportive content). In the event that the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post.

Note to Group Leaders:
These guidelines will be followed in the Personality Disorders Chat Room as well.

At first please gently nudge the conversation towards a supportive atmosphere.
Gently correct any misconceptions, stereotypes or stigmas.
Use your de-escalation skills as per the room supporter training to resolve conflicts if they arise.
Gently explain or remind the speaker that their stance although with the best of intentions is not helpful or supportive to people who have personality disorders and this is firstmost a safe space for people with personality disorders.
Please share the link of this page when necessary.
Call a community moderator on duty if you need support; you can fill in the emergency form available in “Chatroom Guidelines” for the same.
If a member still insists on seeking support regarding their issue, please refer them to a one-on-one chat or rooms such as Support Room 24/7.

Read the 7 Cups Guidelines

Community Leaders

Forum Supporter

@QuietMagic

Chatroom Moderator

@InsightfulPhoenix

@Lou73

Community Resources

Time Zone Converter: click HERE

7 cups Crisis Resources: click HERE

About Dissociation : click HERE

Distress Guide: click HERE

Help Managing Emotions: click HERE

About OCD : click HERE

Room Discussions: click HERE

Resources for BPD: click HERE

Community /

Personality Disorders Support Forum

Ask questions, get support and make friends

About Us

Get Started

Online Therapy

Terms

Considering Therapy?

@littlePrune6216

@affectionateZebra2916

@sincereLion3371

@Shawdios

@Nate715

@Tree000

@VeeEm

@crimsonPenguin2141

@azureCoconut2121

@Mercy6907

@determinedPlum4178

@kaitis

@0chsTree

@closedcoffeeroom

@lightOwl3068

@riyasuthar2004

@CheeseKingdom

@AlJoTu

@DamikaDisorder

@Einfachpatrik

Community Guidelines

Community Leaders

Forum Supporter

Chatroom Moderator

Community Resources

Don’t miss a message!

The 7 Cups app is available on iOS and Android

Community /

Personality Disorders Support Forum

Ask questions, get support and make friends

About Us

Get Started

Online Therapy

Terms

Considering Therapy?

@littlePrune6216

@affectionateZebra2916

@sincereLion3371

@Shawdios

@Nate715

@Tree000

@VeeEm

@crimsonPenguin2141

@azureCoconut2121

@Mercy6907

@determinedPlum4178

@kaitis

@0chsTree

@closedcoffeeroom

@lightOwl3068

@riyasuthar2004

@CheeseKingdom

@AlJoTu

@DamikaDisorder

@Einfachpatrik

Filter by Topic

Community Guidelines

Community Leaders

Forum Supporter

Chatroom Moderator

Community Resources

Personal Conversation Requests

General Conversation Requests

New Messages