We have to lock in
@Hilltop9394 what’s the solution? Why do you think we can’t have a conversation? Can you have a conversation easily when texting other people? We have to get to the bottom of this
i don’t text people unless i have a very random thing to ask. or because i saw them so i’m saying what to do or something. SO I DONT KNOW. i just ramble. like why do we wear shoes if shoes actually hurt our feet when we’re older yk.
@free2118 I don’t text people either unless I have something to say. I think it’s because we don’t know actually know each other so we can’t asked better questions. But I don’t know. We might just be the worst talking people ever
hm. maybe. that’s kinda sad tbh. if it’s cos of that. i mean i ish know you. lol. through a screen. or yeah we just might be pretty bad at talking
@free2118 I’m sorry. But there has to be a reason for us not being able to have a conversation other than we’re just bad at talking
yeah. but like in real life i’m pretty good at it. like i yap my head off
@free2118 me too. And with people I know even though text I can have a conversation. But I guess I probably get carried a ton by the other person
maybe. and you don’t have to apologize sorry. maybe we just haven’t known each other that long? or something like that
@free2118 Still I feel like I should. We’ve been talking for about a half a year now and we still have moments like this where we can’t talk. It’s a bit frustrating. Because I enjoy talking to you and I feel like I’m bothering you and wasting your time like this
no no you aren’t. if anything i’m so sorry i don’t know what to talk about because at this point it should be easy for me to make conversation but i just like idk what you would wanna talk about i get so self conscious lol. and yeah that’s a really long time that we’ve talked lol. but you’re never a bother
Thank you but it shouldn’t be so one sided. I always make things quiet and you always have to be the one to say something. And that isn’t fair at all.
@Hilltop9394 Are you just saying that or do you really have things to talk about but don’t know if I want to. Because I promise you that talking about anything is great good or bad. I’m having to be able to chat and whatever we talk about is just right.
well like when i say i can talk about anything i genuinely can. i like think so much it’s insane. so like i could just talk about a specific part of my day for a long time and be hyper fixated on it.
no no i enjoy talking and when you do talk i enjoy listening:) i’m just glad we talk in general.
@free2118 Me too. Talking with you is always so nice and there is no way you could ever be annoying. Hearing you yap is always so fun and is the best. But I also don’t wanna make you do all the communicative lifting. I feel like you’re doing all talking and I’m just replying. It feels like I’m conversationally letting you down
you’re not. and it’s understandable anyway like you don’t know me and i don’t blame you for not talking about whatever if you don’t know me yk. if that’s the case.
um what if i ask a question and you answer we could do like 20 questions again.
@free2118 ok sure
@Hilltop9394 do you wanna go first?
sure! would you rather people perceive you as kind, smart, or attractive and why
@free2118 I guess it’s a bit superficial but probably attractive. I feel like anyone can be nice, and being smart is just working hard. Anyone can be smart and even if you are it’s all the same to people. But being attractive has a purpose. It’s probably more useful then the other two
not gonna lie that’s very valid. i’ve never thought about it like that. but you make a really good point
@free2118 what would you choose?
i would say smart. i feel like kindness has made people run all over me and i actually have tried to be meaner so people don’t do what they have done to me in the past. maybe if i was smarter not just like book smart but like i guess street smart. maybe if i was i wouldn’t be hurt so often with people who are friends or family. like i’d be smart enough to make better decisions about the people i have close to me or smarter to know to not have hope and stuff idk. i feel like being attractive is already annoying for me because guys just like that in a girl, not really because of who i am, so i wish i was smarter about that too. and im not saying i’m like oh wow a model but i do recognize i’m decently ok. so idk. definitely smarter
@free2118 I get that. All that definitely makes sense and is pretty smart already. But i guess it varies from person to person and all are good answers
It’s getting pretty late and I have to be up early tomorrow. Plus I’m pretty tired to. Is it ok if we just call it a night? We can continue this another day if that’s ok
oh yeah! of course don’t worry. i hope you have a goodnight and a really good day tomorrow! and have fun at the movie!
@free2118 Thank you. Have a good night and a good day tomorrow too. Bye (:
Hi! How was your day mine wasn’t that good
oh i’m sorry do you wanna talk about it? how was yesterday? mine wasn’t great either
@free2118 I’m sorry to hear that. But I just felt so horrible and useless so nothing to really talk about. Yesterday was better though. What about you? And do you wanna talk about yours?
@Hilltop9394 well feeling horrible and useless isn’t good. did you just feel like that or did something happen.
and no i just was practically alone all day and i don’t do well alone i like barely function. so i was trying to make my day better but i felt like no one bothers to check up on me or see if i’m ok or care so idk weird spiral. but then i was like i need to do stuff so i tried. i’m sorry you felt like that though. you aren’t to me if that helps in any way
@free2118 thank you and m so sorry about how your day went so badly.
@Hilltop9394 Is there anything you wanna talk about specifically?
@Hilltop9394 Hopefully tomorrow will be much better for you
thank you same for you i hope it gets better :)
how was the movie? and no i’m ok. just me feeling lonely lol
@free2118 It was really really cool. And my coworker got me free snacks too
ooh yum! i’m so happy for you! i wish i could get free snacks haha
@free2118 I love those movies so much and I’ve never seen the extended cut so I was like woahhhhh. And alsooooo I got a CD!!!
omg yay!!! what cd??!!!!
@free2118 I got to the theater way too early so I decided to go to the local thrift store that has absolutely no cds. Like 4 tiny bins with all garbage. But I went and got The Nylon Curtain by Billie Joel. I’ve never heard it but I like Billie Joel so I bought I figured why not.
@Hilltop9394 But I listened to the first three songs on the way home and they were pretty alright
oooh Billie Joel is pretty good! i’m glad you got one though!’ First cd in your collection!!!!
@free2118 Me too I hope it doesn’t suck lol. How was your yesterday?
it was ok. i went to an interview at a hospital so that was very cool for pediatrics. also scary but i think it went well. then i went to my grandparents apartment but they weren’t there so i made myself some coffe and sat outside in their porch and drowned in thoughts which is not good but it’s ok. and then i went home and was just like numb all day! but i made pasta so that was good.
Yeah I can’t read anything. Idk if you can
it was ok. i went to an interview at a hospital for pediatrics and i think it went well. then i went to my grandparents apartment but they were gone so i made a cup of coffee and sat on their porch and drowned myself in thoughts. which is not good but it’s ok! idk i was just numb all day i don’t really love the sun and summer and stuff because of the sun but yeah. it was ok. excited for the potential job interviews i have this week
@free2118 That’s good that you have all those interviews setup. I bet your gonna get hired for all of them
@Hilltop9394 I’m sorry you had bad thoughts these last two days. What were you thinking about? If it’s ok for me to ask. I keep forgetting it’s public so we don’t have to talk about anything if you don’t want to
haha i wish. probably not all of them but yes!
@free2118 No it’s true you’ll get every one and then have all the options
hahaha ok so i’m only 18 people do this for their whole lives so i probably am not that experienced
@free2118 experienced with what?
@Hilltop9394 oh with your job. No way they see someone who’s been working for 20 years and be like nah I’m ok
@Hilltop9394 they’ll be like lemme get 🕺
AHAHAHA imagine. bruh this would be my first legit medical job. i’m going to pass out the moment i enter as a worker lmaooo
@free2118 It’s ok there will probably be a lot of doctors and stuff if you do. So you’re definitely covered
oh that’s right. well then maybe i might just pass away. but anyway hopefully i get one of them. i have an interview with a women’s specialty clinic tomorrow then thursday a behavioral, and like sui cidal clinic which idk how much that’ll help my mental health but we’ll see. and then on friday i have an interview with cardiology so the heart! like heart transplants so i could see surgeries so i’d be so happy i would totally pass away.
@free2118 Nooooo do not pass away who am I gonna road trip with????? But all of those sounds so cool! And the su icide one might help you learn something about your mental health. So it might be helpful. But if you do go and you don’t feel good about please leave. I know you can get another job somewhere else. So seriously if it’s making you upset please go.
yeah i’ll have to see as i go. just cos i used to be in one of those clinics for a bit so it might be triggering buttttt it could also help me resolve stuff. and no no i won’t die 🙄 i desperately need to do that road trip. also what color sleeping bag do you want like princess wise.
@free2118 Ok that’s good. But your would be the best heart surgeon ever. And brain surgeon too. Any surgeon you would be great at. And if I need brain surgery I better get it on a discount. Take off a dollar or something
lmaoooo i’ll do it pro bono for you, but that’ll never happen because i will never operate on you. because you’ll be healthy
But you ALREADY KNOW what color I want. If you don’t know I’m gonna be so sad
@Hilltop9394 Like 🥺🥺🥺😞😞😞😢😢😢😿😿😿
IS IT PINK OR NO
@free2118 YESSSSSSS
@Hilltop9394 I want it the hottest of pinks so I can be a beautiful pretty princess 💖💖💖💅💅💅💅💕💕💕
@Hilltop9394 OMG LET ME SEE PLEASE!!!!
@Hilltop9394 HOTTEST
typo
lmaooooo ok ok lemme pull it up
@free2118 AHAHAHAHAHAHAH MY JAW ABSOLUTELY DROPPED I GOT SO HAPPY.
I was like 0: but happy and amazing
@Hilltop9394 How big does it say it is?
AHAHAHA i’m glad you’re happy but :0
it says 26 by 46 lmaooo
@free2118 It’s more than enough
@Hilltop9394 I’m gonna be so 👼
that’s soooo tiny. like even i can’t fit my whole body in it and im smaller than you bro. we’re screwed. we should get other sleeping bags just in case
@free2118 OMG WE SHOULD
but like ACTUAL camping ones since it gets so cold. like it’s super hot here but like holy coldness at night. we need good sleeping bags so start searching
@free2118 it’s ok we can where them on top
@Hilltop9394 wear typo
wear*
omgggg i almost beat you
@free2118 that will never happen. And I always use the right your now so it’s ok. But I build a very complex diagram of the sleeping bags
@Hilltop9394 We might suffocate but it’s ok. It will be fine
@Hilltop9394 I’m in the slightly taller bag on the right
AHAHAJAJAHA THATS NOT OK. also what’s with the T in the middle 😭
@free2118 I took a screenshot cause I needed a place to draw. It was ticket master. But it can stand for whatever you what. I don’t know
omg ticketmaster for concerts?! i was just using that website today. i thought it meant trial cos of the guy in the bottom dying
@free2118 AHAHAHAHA It’s that now. But some guy made me download it when we were talking about shows. Today was the second time I’ve every opened it
Have a good night and a good day tomorrow too. Hopefully you get all of those jobs and the you feel a lot better tomorrow mentally