i don't want to see this through

I'm not sure exactly where to post this but i saw accountability and i guess this works,

in short, i lied, i didn't know i was lying at the time but now, i think i was and I'm not sure if i want to see how it goes down if it ends up badly, this isn't really a small white lie and I'm not sure if it's another thing i get to just walk past in life it would prove allot of people who think less of me right, I've never been bullied to my knowledge but who knows it might start if this goes south, I'm scared too scared to sleep, I've seen all of my issues through for the most part but this may be too much for me. I think someone outside my situation probably wouldn't get why it's so bad but just imagine you got a promotion that nobody thought you would get but, it wasn't yours so now you sit there with others who earned it when you didn't so now you either stay with them and try to elevate yourself to their level so you can deserve the position with a chance of being caught, or you step down and face the people who knew you couldn't actually do it. none of these are good options but it's not like i can just do nothing i either do something or i "end" those are my options, and i think this might be it for me. because both options on the do something side end in tragedy. but I'm not sure if i want to end.