Mindfulness isn't happiness
(Is this the right place to post this?)
I think there is a lot of confusion that mindfulness is about being happy. That if you are struggling with life, you can't be mindful. That if you are poor, depressed, anxious or abused, that you can't be mindful - or possibly even worse, it is made to sound like mindfulness is the thing that will cure anything that needs to be fixed.
But mindfulness can happen at anytime. You aren't telling yourself you are happy all the time. That is just another form of self-delusion. You're just watching, becoming one with awareness: This is how things are right now. Maybe you aren't happy with it, but maybe you can find a way to be ok with it.
Awareness isn't happy or sad, anxious or depressed, angry or in denial. Awareness simply is. This is how your body is feeling right now. This is what your mind is thinking. This is the sound that surrounds you. There is absolutely nothing that keeps you from practicing mindfulness - except unconsciousness. There are moments of great discomfort and pain in any life. Mindfulness doesn't fix your pain or make the discomfort go away, but it does give you a different way to relate to your pain. Pain isn't constant, it ebbs and it flows. Can you be aware of the pain, and ride the waves? Can you let go of the stories you tell yourself about your pain, like it will never get better or no one feels the way you do?
Mindfulness is a buzzword right now, like "peace" was in the 70s. And we see a lot of the same imagery. Here is a beatific being, usually dressed in white with a happy meditative look on her face. But mindfulness doesn't always look peaceful. If you were to watch me in my day, and trying to figure out when I was practicing mindfulness, I sincerely doubt you would be able to tell. I might be smiling, but I might have a frown of concentration or be listening intently to a coworker. I might be crying or teaching group cycle. I might be sighing as I press the elevator button.
I have been practicing mindfulness for twenty years (ish), and I have probably gotten to the point I am able to practice this open awareness most of the day. 60-80%, on the average day. But only 5% of that will see me meditating with a peaceful expression on my face.
@ThisIs543
HI This thank you for sharing this. Now let me get some thoughts together here
Yes I belief some out there mistaken mindfulness is all about being happy. But there also is some truth to this as well. I believe mindfulness IS NOT happiness though. Mindfulness let's us accept many difficult things we face in life easier. Such as mood, disabilities, mental health, job, relationships as well as dealing with ourselves. As we practice more and more mindfulness skills we are able to "tolerate" things more in life and the insides of us. We observe instead of judge. We don't react so strongly on things in our lives, but take that moment to slow down and "think" of our responses/reactions.
I do really agree with you on mindfulness doesn't "fix" but more so helps us accept, be aware and deal with things that are not so great in our lives. As we deal with things coming our way mindfulness just has us more aware of our inner slef, our inner feelings, our way we present ourselves and so on. Also doing mindfulness isn't 100% in our daily lives, every day, every week. Its just there. I can share many of times over the million years I have mindfulness in my life. I can take 2 weeks being rebellious to mindfulness. Mostly cause I am unwilling to really take a look into myself of something I need to work on-for me not anyone else.
Again I want to thank you for opening sharing this it was great
I would like to revive this thread because it dovetails with my questions.
Does anyone has thoughts on the increasing Western interest in this brand of 'mindfulness' that is beginning to look like another wellness fad, in the vein of the keto diet or yoga? Does that advance or detract from the benefits of the practice?
Yesterday, as I was waiting in a checkout line at a large store, the magazine rack displayed front page articles which together seemed to speak of a certain cultural psychosis. Among them were an article on increasing intelligence, and article on increasing creativity, an article on increasing mindfulness, an article on regulating blood sugar, and an article about decorating for summer with the latest trends.
What bothers me is that practicing mindfulness seems like it could easily become another method of trying to achieve perfection/optimizing ourselves as if we are robots or tools (or, a 'happiness' fix). This obsesssion seems very common among my peer group (the much discussed 'millennials', which used to be two different generations, and now seem to be three generations lumped together as "everyone born within the last 40 years because we're too lazy to make distinguish between major cohorts when everyone can be lumped into categories of 'old' or 'young' with one new buzzword").
There is a rich history of theory, philosophy, and practice that informs the pop psychology of mindfulness, especially in Eastern traditions. It is quickly dulled and oversimplified by mass dissemination and the tendency of Western culture to commericalize everything.
How were you first introduced to what we call "mindfulness"? What is your understanding of that idea(s)? What does it mean to you? I think these are important questions to ask to help gain some perspective on the topic, to understand it better and get past the generalizations... at least to me, maybe for others as well. Thank you for any further discussion.
