Mindfulness and Setting Goals -- Help?
Hello Mindfulness peeps...
(hope I'm in the right place for this...)
I was just thinking about goal setting - something that is actually hard for me to do. I seem to have quite a bit of Murphy's Law at work in my life -- best laid plans of mice and men often go awry. With that awriness comes quite a bit of internal dialogue -- weather patterns of the mind -- that seem to get in the way and often discourage planning in advance. I've taken the route of - do it now, get it done, check it off, and move on OR honestly, its complete opposite - it's not that important, put it off or don't bother.
I'm honestly struggling with this idea. As others in my life are trying to plan it for me (long story) and demanding (yes, demanding) a plan of action - I'm forced to alter my methods from its existing format (right now or not) to "what are you doing for the next 10-20 years" (yet, another long story and which is making me feel more out of control of my situation than I like).
What thoughts and tips can you share on setting goals (and the steps beyond- action plan, accomplishing, resetting goals after accomplishing it) and doing it all mindfully?
Thanks
@diplomaticconfucious
Hi! I think there's a delicate balance to this, and it's a great question! Personally - as much as I love mindfulness, I think there are times where we can't be truly mindful all the time. If I'm in therapy for example, I have to let my mind go and just chat without even being fully aware of what we're talking about - or if I'm writing a song/story, I've got to let it go and dig in to being creative.
I think goal setting is quite similar - can you potentially let go of the mindfulness while you create these goals?
What sort of internal dialogue are you noticing? and how is it that this is discouraging your planning? Is there a way that you can kind of be with all those negative weather conditions without allowing them to influence what you'd like to do?
What I do personally is allow myself to not be mindful while I'm creating these goals - the more I think of things to do the more I act on it until I have a whole list. Then I can be mindful again - I know what they are, when they're due, what I have to do. I also use SMART goals (specific, measurable, actionable, realistic and timely) which help enormously. Once I have all my goals in place it's fair to say that being mindful is a lot easier afterwards.
I'm not sure if this helps or not? I think it's about finding out what works for you.
@diplomaticconfucious
Many people realize the importance of being able to set goals, but dont really know how to do it. In order to create goals and actually accomplish them..... you need to find a motivation. What motivates you in life?
@CherryBlossom360
Thanks for taking time to reply.
At this moment... I can't answer your question about what motivates me. It is one day at a time, fulfilling obligations to employer, caretaking, and surviving- literally.
Its resolving whatever issue pops up and moving to the next- its what has to be dealt with right now to make it to the next thing on the list, end of shift, and the end of the day. Its focusing on what's happening now and gliding the dance lfloor- two steps forward, one step back and realizing even going backwards is progress
@diplomaticconfucious Hi! I think of everyone struggles in setting goals. For me I have to sit down and decide what goal or goals am I trying to reach, then I list some objectives to get me to where i need to be. I am not that great either at setting my personal self-care goals. It seems like life can keep you pretty busy. I would recommend taking some quite time alone where you can think about what you are currently doing and what you could possibly change.
