idk im im strait or bi
hey im Kayla, im 15 and a female. i feel like im attracted to both males and females but idk cause i dont really get the same feeling when I think about them. like I never really had a crush ever. but when i talk to guys which is really rare they make me feel nervous and I feel flattered that there actually talking to me. that's probably the normal reaction to have. i think it's just cause i don't really get any attention from guys at all. and also I don't even see myself getting married. i don't want to settle down w someone i think. i just want to be free to do whatever I want with anyone i want. then again i am 14 so i got a lot of time to figure that stuff out. ok, now when I talk to girls which is also really rare i often find myself staring at them because of how pretty they are like wow idk if i wanna be them or i wanna be with them. i don't really get those butterflies that I do w males but I really want to. I do fantasize about being in a relationship w both genders. and I'm more sexually attractive to women but. so Idk if I'm straight or bi pls help thxx
One thing to realize is that you can always change your mind. These things are fluid and you can always change your mind. Have you ever heard the term demi-sexual? Try googling that and see how you feel about that. At your age I was in the same boat. But I will say that you can figure that out gradually but to always make sure you do well in school. I know this sounds like another adult trying to put pressure, but once you hit college that's probably the best time to really figure out yourself in that way. At 14/15 it's best to try to get good grades and have healthy platonic relationships with friends. I knew this girl that had a miscarriage while she's in high school with an older boyfriend who was a year or so older than her. You don't want to be in that situation. With girl friends I can say if you get a girlfriend make sure both families are accepting of your LGBTQ identity. I would also suggest that if you get a boyfriend or girlfriend that you are using protection. That you also take everything they say in sex ed to heart. I would also ask your parents to find a way to get you vaccinated for HPV which could possibly lead to cancer in the future. Anyways, you have a lot of time to truly figure yourself out. You don't always have to settle on one thing when it comes to your identity. I hope this helps and that you can go to an adult that won't exploit you or treat you less than for the questions you're posing. Hope that helps!
@im2tired I know it can be hard to figure out these things, particularly at such a young age when there's still a lot of developing going on both emotionally and sexually. However, you don't necessarily need "lived experience" to identify with any orientation. It's more about how you see yourself in relation to other genders. If you can see yourself with boys and girls, if you think a relationship with either of them would make you happy, than it's alright to identify as bisexual! And it's also ok if the way you experience attraction to boys is different from the way you experience attraction to girl. It doesn't have to be exactly the same kind of feeling, but if you feel drawn to both and you could see yourself happy in a relationship with both, then you are bi!
