Is it possible?
Hi! I'm not sure how to start this, so i'll improve:
Is possible to control our feelings to not to fall in love with someone?
This is my story: I knew a few years ago a girl at my music school, we barely talked at that time but somehow... we reconected through some video edition issue, she wanted to learn how to edit videos and someone told about me and then she called me and we met.
Since then, we clicked so well to each other, our conversation is always fluid and deep, i really really enjoy spending time with her. I feel atracted to her but there's a BIG issue, a very common issue between gay people: she's straight. She doesn't know about my sexuality and i want to be honest with her. I know that i have zero chances to be in a relationship with her but i wanna be her friend. Also i feel terrified to open myself because she had very bad experiences with lesbians ( some women harrassed her and others touched her without her consent. So she has this bad idea about lesbians :( ... i never ever do that to her, even if i like her so much... that's why i'm doubtful to tell her who am i)
So... in conclusion... is it possible to burn this feelings? Should i be honest with her? i don't wanna lose her friendship.
Hey, sorry to hear you are in this situation, that must be hard! Well, in general, no, most people cannot decide who they fall for, unfortunately. Of course, there are others that swear on certain methods to fall out of love. These include but are in no way limited to imagining the other person in embarrassing or weird situation (on the toilet for example), reminding oneself of the other person’s flaws, etc. These will not work for everybody though. If it makes you feel better, clear the air. It is hard to be friends when something like this stands between the two parties. If you want to talk about it in more depth, don’t hesitate to text me:)
@LisaListens2ugladly Thank you. heheh i'm 100% sure that this imagination technique will not work for me. 🙈 I'm trying to set myself limits to avoid a deep interaction with her (sending meassured and spaced texts, not being too obvious, not staring at her, trying to be a simply friend... it works... kinda.
it would be a pleasure to talk about this more in deep. Thank you so much!