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Far right family issues

User Profile: diligentDrum7773
diligentDrum7773 November 15th, 2024

My partner's sister and her fiancé have recently shown support for a very far right figure. Some of the things they pointed out were extremely selfish. Not only that I don't know how she can do that to her own sister when the figure is anti gay.

After hearing they support him, it's like there's no coming back from that. I now see them in a different light.

Would anyone else feel the same in this situation? 

4
User Profile: Aayla
Aayla November 16th, 2024
@diligentDrum7773 I understand how disappointing and hurtful this is. Whether or not they realize how hurtful that is for their sibling, the point still stands that supporting someone who is against your sibling's rights and very existence is a move that actively affects their life in a negative way.
I think it's ok to distantiate yourself from family members that are having a negative impact on your life. If your partner is feeling hurt, and rightfully so, it's not selfish to step back from having close contacts with her sister: mental health always comes first, and keeping a distance at least for a while might be the best choice at the moment.
I support you wholeheartedly and I hope things will eventually get better!
2 replies
User Profile: diligentDrum7773
diligentDrum7773 OP November 17th, 2024

@Aayla My partner is choosing to ignore it. I don't really have the option to distance my self unfortunately, as I'm also trying to support my partner through grief. Part of me feels selfish for feeling this way while she's dealing with that 

1 reply
User Profile: Aayla
Aayla November 17th, 2024
@diligentDrum7773 there is no wrong way to feel about this, your feelings are valid as much as your partner's. Of course for your partner there are more feelings involved, since it's her family, and it's harder to distantiate. All you can do is helping your partner process any feelings that may come with this situation and eventually provide options if one day her perspective will start changing. Just remember there's nothing selfish with how you feel, you're doing your best to deal with a very hurtful situation
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User Profile: WellsFiction
WellsFiction November 17th, 2024

@diligentDrum7773 I'm sorry they've done this to you. Family lines are very messy and murky, especially now. try to distant yourself. I mean like don't allow their actions to harm your life. They can't control you and they realize this. I have family members who look down on members of my family cause they don't go to the same church as them. They basically look at their political, religious beliefs as superior, I'm nonbinary/trans. My mom doesn't agree with that, yet she still loves me and wants me to be happy. I don't care if people agree with me, yet when they start, trying to force their ways on me that's a problem.  

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