I think I might be part of the Ace Spectrum. But I need help, and I need someone amount of... validation?

Hello everyone.

Continue only if you're willing to read something long and confusing. I'm sorry.

TW: *MENTION OF SEXUAL THINGS/MASTURBATION*

I don't know if I belong here, but I had no where else to go. I don't have ace friends, and it's not easy to find ace- friendly spaces. And knowing you're ace is so much more difficult that knowing if you're bi, or gay or pan, or whatever. I know about AVEN, but I'm too nervous and overwhelmed to make a thread there. I don't want people to feel like I'm just a sexual looking for attention.
So thank you in advance, for providing a safe space where I can express my doubts and worries, and I'm sorry for bothering you.
Coming to the point. I'm a 16 year old Girl.
Last year, I started questioning my sexuality because I thought I was really drawn to this girl. I still consider her my crush and my gay awakening. But thinking of it now, I never saw her and thought of wanting to do anything sexual with her. I liked her romantically, and aesthetically. She was intriguing, and kind of mysterious and just really beautiful to look at. I couldn't help feel drawn to her. I loved being around her, small gestures to help her, making her smile... just all the sweet stuff, you know? Anyway, so I really liked her, like i wanted to be with her, and hold her hand and maybe kiss her and hug her when she was sad, and dance with her in the night. Idk I'm kinda dreamy lol.
3-4 months into adoring her so much, she committed suicide. I was devastated. She never talked to me about it and I wished I'd told her. When I used to sob at home my mother used to remark, 'I don't think any of her friends are as affected by it as you are'. And obviously, I adored her. But I was confused.
Now I had no way of ever figuring out what I really felt for her.
2-3 months into it, I developed a close friendship with one of her best friends at school. We bonded over the grief, and she'd figured out I had a crush on her friend the first time we talked about her. But we also made each other forget that the grief even existed. It felt like there was no bound to how Happy we felt around each other. Maybe it was insensitive to do that, but I couldn't help it.
I fell in love with her.
For weeks, I didn't tell her. She'd say "I'm straight I guess but who knows". I once asked her out and she said yes for it. A few weeks later, I couldn't take it anymore and told her how I felt, and she said she felt the same way. She asked me to be her girlfriend, and I said yes. Obviously. I started to identify as BISEXUAL, because it felt right. So we were in a relationship, and most of it was young and sweet and happy. We were cute. But I learnt from her that she and my guy best friend had feelings for each other.
Twice, I asked her to reconsider and twice she chose me. The third time, she broke up with me and dated him three days later. It's been more than 2 months they're still together and I still hurt.
I'm not aromantic, I have developed crushes on people. However, since the last few months, I've been questioning if I'm ace. I don't know what sexual attraction feels like.
- I've never looked at someone and felt like they're sohotiwannahavesexwiththem. I do find people beautiful and I like staring at them. But that's all.
-I've never felt aroused by porn and I've never felt the need to masturbate.
- I didn't feel sexually aroused when my ex girlfriend and I got slightly intimate.
-I don't feel the urge to have sex with guys. There was a time I'd have wanted it but the thought of it just makes me feel kind of sick now.
-However, I have had crushes on guys 2-3 years back.
- there was a small phase where I liked a guy last year, but that was only aesthetic and slightly romantic, similar to what I felt for my dead crush *ouch!*
-I don't believe I was sexually attracted to either of these two girls, or any woman ever.
-I don't relate to my friends when they talk about hot people or sexual things.
- The thought of nakedness (my own, and others') makes me kind of uncomfortable.
- I've never had sexual dreams.
- I'm not sex repulsed. I've never had sex, and maybe I'd try it. But I can't really imagine being too interested in it.
-Maybe I'd like sex as a display of affection and intimacy, but I'm not really sure .

Now Idk if I'm part of the asexual spectrum (labels that I might relate to are grey ace, demisexual and cupiosexual). And I do know I like girls romantically, but I'm not very sure about guys. Idk if I relate to biromantic or homoromantic.
So I've been going by 'queer' but it doesn't make me comfortable to not have a label.
JUST BEING VALIDATED that I do (or don't) belong here would help.
Let me know what you think I could do to know things better, or know what to go by. Because I really, really need to feel I belong somewhere now.