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Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #1) Welcome to Course 2!

Heather225 August 6th, 2020

Please note: In order to successfully complete Course 2, you must respond to this post. Your comment/response should answer the questions/shows that you completed the given activity (if any). Read the post carefully and follow the instructions given. Save your responses to a document that you can later refer to. You will need to copy/paste your response in the course evaluation form at the end of each course to show that you have done the work and to refresh your memory.
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Congrats! You made it the second course in the LDP! In this course, we focus on the specific interpersonal skills needed to be a strong leader on 7 Cups, including mastery of communication skills, time management, conflict resolution, stress management and empowering new leaders.

I know if you are here, you have read our values and culture guide. I would like to start off by further emphasizing one value that's required for a leader to be successful here, and that is balancing High Expectations & High Warmth.

Work environments with high expectations and minimal warmth tend to result in companies that are very driven, rule-oriented and risk-averse. The people do not tend to grow as much personally or professionally. On the other hand, workplaces that are high in warmth, but have minimal expectations, tend to struggle. Everyone is happy and feels loved, but not a lot of effective or focused work gets done.

7 Cups is high expectations AND high warmth. We expect a lot from you. You might feel like we think you are more capable than other people have suggested or maybe even more capable than how you see yourself. That is okay. Every person on the team has outperformed and done better than they expected. This is largely because warmth, patience, and trust help people make much more progress than they have in other environments. We have high expectations, but we will provide plenty of encouragement and guidance to help you get there.

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Question: What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth? How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

Activity: Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!

After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next post here! You must take part in the brainstorming/activities given in all of these posts to successfully complete the program.


This post is brought to you by the Leadership Development Program Team, find out more information about the program here.

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SirenOfSerenity September 4th, 2022

@Heather225

Question: What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth? How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?


- An imbalance of expectations and warmth causes a breakdown in the overall objective. We cannot have high expectations without providing high warmth as the support, encouragement and empowerment to do so.


- Having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact:


1.) The community negatively, as it sets an overall tone of too little warmth and unclear/unsupported expectations for the community.


and 2.) Negatively impact how you work with your fellow leaders. Low warmth/support and low/unclear expectations makes it difficult to work together more cohesively and in an enjoyable manner.

3 replies
KimByeongIn September 4th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity

Hey again! You've given a wonderful and apt answer. I'm so glad to have you as my peer! Let's enjoy this process.

Mari228 September 13th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity

i like how you mentioned unclear expectations because for an effective team and community and self we need those clear objectives and how we’ll get there. Low expectations will make things too easy in the sense that no one will put enough effort to make something better than it already is and low warmth will make things too hard for people to keep up all the energy they’re using and investing.

1 reply
sincereMelon7870 September 17th, 2022

@Mari228 I agree on the importance of insight gathering and reflection. It’s what makes us empathetic.

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yourbuddy30 October 6th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity I agree siren! we must avoid the negativity between our members/fellow listeners and work as a team. For this we need to have high expectations and also high warmth for us to function more efficiently and contribute to this community in a better way

iCareUK October 7th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity

Siren, as always, a very powerful and accurate message as always and so very proud to have you have my mentor.

PREWARNING! I love trees!

Sirens response to this post is very accurate and correct, and details the main initial factors of 7 cups, and I have studied 7 cups intensely to make sure it is good for me, but I'm sure there's thing I haven't even seen because there is so much to see.

WARNING😂 | Imagine a tree, it's huge, it's beautiful and it's absolutely blossoming, the branches that adjoin is our amazing members who come here to find love, support, encouragement, advice or to look for resources, at times, they may be in times of great distress which is why it is important to follow up on all the information and advice given by everyone to manage these situations to protect not only yourself but your fellow peers.

Then we come to the bark of the tree, or the backbone, this is @GlenM (Sorry dude), this holds everything together along with all those lovely people working alongside him to keep 7 cups afloat and strengthening the tree as a whole.

At the bottom is the ground and roots, this is us as leaders, and I'm not sure what you know about roots but it is very important when you look at most situations in your life, trees help me to do this.

The roots of a tree need some love and care which is given by Glen and his guys who are up there in the admin roles (not to discredit anyone by the way, we are ALL EQUAL), the roots of a tree need water (given by the rain), air and a good solid ground with comfortable and suitable surroundings.

Without all these components in the ground that tree will deteriorate and ultimately die so us, as leaders, need to make sure the roots are good and healthy, and this is how we strengthen everything above, this isn't saying we're down in the ground and rubbish, what it means is that we, as the roots, are the ultimate power, 7 cups needs us to work together, whilst also working alone, ask for help when needed, because this isn't the real world, everyone here literally cares to the bottom of their hearts and I've never EVER met such lovely, kind and caring people (Damn crying now) oh well, carry on.

by doing this, we keep the roots strong and healthy, we can travel up to the backbone and to the branches to build and grow 7 cups.

Ultimately, the members are the blossom of the tree (beautiful people too!) and we need to ensure that all those resources match the members needs and display what they want and need, we can do this simply by observation or communication, if we don't do that, the blossom will fall like it's autumn and the branches will be bare.

Thanks for reading.

NOTE: I really have to say that Siren is the most loving, compassionate, affectionate person I have ever met, she has picked me back up so many times and boosted me to succeed when all I've seen is failure, she is such an incredible person, and (I mean this in the friendliest way possible) I love you so much and thank you for being so amazing, because I also believe you will grow even further in 7 cups, @GlenM please give Siren a reward (even just a badge) because she is an absolute star.

Side note: You are all stars, everyone registered on 7 cups, and for my peers in the LDP and GLDD programs, you can do this! but please ask for help from the mentors (link is in your emails) because they really do care about you and want you to succeed.

I'm going to stop now before I become an emotional wreck and sorry for hijacking your post @SirenOfSerenity

1 reply
zareya November 11th, 2022

@iCareUK

Your tree & roots example makes me think more and expand on this concept. You are so right, well said!

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November 5th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity

well said and brought up some good points

zareya November 11th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity

Yup, you're right in all of these things. It is difficult to work together if there is low warmth and expectations!

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KimByeongIn September 4th, 2022

@Heather225

Low expectations will:

  1. Make me set a goal lower than my potential and/or the work required in this field and would therefore hinder my ability to enact my role.
  2. Uncover a set of low skills rather than empowering me to do better.

Low warmth will:

  1. Not ensure a station of understanding between my peers and will reflect as a demerit for the whole community.
  2. Be counter-productive to this entire operation as it depends on being compassionate and empathetic to each and everyone.

1 reply
Mari228 September 13th, 2022

@KimByeongIn

I agree with these statements in that without enough expectations from others nor ourselves we wouldn’t have the motive to reach as high and not make the changes we really want to have and too low on warmth we would eventually break down or not be as resilient through tough times.

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Mari228 September 13th, 2022

@Heather225

What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth?

What happens if I have an imbalance is that I wouldn’t be as dedicated not committed to working with the community and this would also reflect with the persons around me. For example if I had too much warmth and not enough expectations while yes I would feel good and appreciated but then end up slacking or putting off difficult tasks; if I get too high expectations and not enough warmth while I would achieve more and understand that it’s because I have capabilities I wouldn’t feel appreciated enough nor feel any real purpose behind the work. I’ve experienced this in a couple of ways such as when I was in dance and even sometimes my current work while I would be given the high expectations with my abilities and not warmth it would be too robotic whereas with other areas like family I would be given all the warmth but sometimes not enough expectations in terms of what I should do to take care of my surroundings.

How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

Having too low expectations or warmth would impact the community because they wouldn’t care or respect for each other. They would turn to more reactive behaviors and from not overcoming the hardships would lose something that can potentially strengthen them. They would also feel alone but also useless and it’s the last things they want to feel in a community they seek to be a part of when in their real world they get treated that same way. This would impact my work with fellow leaders in that there walls would be built between us and things would happen or not happen without everyone’s awareness which would eventually collapse the unity and harmony of the group. Like if one leader was telling another about their mistakes without giving the warmth and understanding the other other leader would eventually recede and try to not reach out again so they won’t feel hurt again even if they could improve their work.

1 reply
CosmicMiracle November 9th, 2022

@Mari228 thank you for sharing your insights. I have to say I highly resonate with some of it and I agree with your points as echoed in my own responses. I look forward to responding to more of your insights, I hope you don't mind :D

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sincereMelon7870 September 17th, 2022

I think engagement with other community members would sink too low. Other leaders would feel there was little contribution you could make at times and at other times you would succeed.

yourbuddy30 October 6th, 2022

@Heather225 What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth? How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact the community and work with fellow listeners?

High expectations and high warmth are needed in careers and platforms such as 7 cups where we work together to achieve the same goal of supporting each other and being there for each other.

How it can impact the community-: We as listeners or as people always have a scope of improvement. With high expectations and warmth, we can achieve that goal of improving. Low expectations can satisfy us with what we are, and we might not be able to contribute more as a listener to our members and support them in their difficult journeys. Having expectations from us pushes us to work harder and contribute more to the leadership roles we have. Low warmth can be a turn off to provide more to the community or the feeling of pressure and dominance can overtake it and we might not contribute as much as we want to contribute to the community or the leadership role

Impact on how you work with your fellow leaders. High expectations and high warmth from our fellow leaders would help them achieve more efficiently under their comfortable pace. Improper balance might not lead to proper functioning of a certain task. High expectations with little warmth can put them under the pressure to complete it or high warmth and low expectations wouldn't help them in achieving more and contributing to the community. Hence high expectations and high warmth should go hand in hard to achieve something bigger and more efficiently

1 reply
CosmicMiracle November 9th, 2022

@yourbuddy30 thank you for sharing your insights! As always, yours remain nuggets of wisdom and I cherish your thoughts :)

I agree about a comfortable pace. We each have our own that is effective for us and just because someone may be slower or faster than ours means one is better than the other. Truly, it is an important thing to note as leaders moving forward <3

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iCareUK October 7th, 2022

@Heather225

@Heather225

@Heather225

What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth?

I have an imbalance right now, it means you need to organise your time more effectively, which I struggle with but organising time is key, reach out for help if needed and don't be frightened to ask for help.

How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact

1.) the community

Having low expectations, I see is like love, if you have little of it and your low, it impacts everyone around you, so likewise, having low expectations and little warmth will impact the community hard, how you approach things will affect others, so even when I am down, I can pop that to one side because listening to members is very therapeutic and will spread to everyone, if you promote love, you receive love, if you promote hate, you receive hate


2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

I think this is a very interesting question, I spoke earlier in the course about my love for trees and how they have a special place because they are so relatable, and they are! so if we as a root is dying, this will impact on the leaders, so it is ultimately important to talk to the leaders if struggling so they are aware of your situation and how to support you, and believe me, they will support you! :)

November 5th, 2022

1 low expectations and low warmth

A community

It would lead to no one knowing what is expected of them and not much growth would happen.

B fellow leaders I would not what know what to do and I would not be a good team mate.

B Low warmth

There would be a lot fights and trusting issues. The work would not get done and lack of leadership.

I would withdraw from my fellow leaders since places with alot of drama I do not do well in.

1 reply
CosmicMiracle November 9th, 2022

@Goalsforlife thank you for your insights <3 I very much agree with what you said about drama developing in the community which is very unhealthy in any space of work whether online or offline. It can be toxic and it will take more than usual to motivate people to come back here and volunteer should that be the case.

This a very important thing to note as we all evolve into the leaders that we can be :) thank you! <3

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CosmicMiracle November 9th, 2022
When there is an imbalance of expectations and warmth, there will be a lot of frustrations and needs that aren’t met, which translates to (mild) trauma. Trauma isn’t just about abuse, it’s also when needs aren’t met. (https://www.***.gram.com/reel/Cj6tY9grP2a/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y%3D)

Low expectations are equivalent to low standards and would result in lax performance. If there are low expectations, unprofessional habits can develop from even the most professional team members and other personal standards that are worth noting in individuals can be compromised. It’s not just 7Cups that would be affected but also the individuals, and on a different spectrum, possibly out-of-cups life.

Low warmth will go against our culture of appreciation, compassion, and kindness. Being too focused on goals will lower the collective morale of the team. As volunteers, warmth is the return we get for our efforts so if we have low of this in supply, one of our core principles will be gone and it will lead to fewer volunteers which will eventually dismantle the brand.

Any workplace or organization is an ecosystem so low expectations and/or low warmth will significantly impact the entirety of the whole.

It will affect the community and fellow leaders because the imbalance might further develop mental health issues. We also heavily rely on collaboration and working together, and this would be very challenging and difficult if there is no balance.
1 reply
Josh3889 December 7th, 2022

@CosmicMiracle

Could have never said this better!

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zareya November 11th, 2022

@Heather225

What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth? How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

If I have an imbalance of expectations and warmth, it will result in a negative outcome and not help myself or anyone else. 1) It will impact the community inefficiently and it won't help those succeed or grow. 2) How you work with your fellow leaders will make it difficult to work with them and grow as a team.

1 reply
Josh3889 December 7th, 2022

@zareya

Very good insight!

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Josh3889 December 7th, 2022

Hello everyone,

1: I believe that having too little of expectations will result in not meeting my goals & or goals of the community. I believe that everyone needs a little bit of a challenge to make life interesting. Anything less than a challenge just won't match the work effort.

2: As I said above everyone needs a challenge & part of that challenge is encouragement from the community. If you don't have warmth in the community or in yourself then the challenge is pointless.





Question: What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth? How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

1 reply
Soul576 December 19th, 2023

@Josh3889

I like how you've voiced your opinions, and I wholeheartedly agree!

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