Twinkle's Crazy blunt remarks on life

@LittleSunshine2036

*sits with Twinkle friend and sends big hugs if okie* 💖 proud of twinkle friend for creating a safe diary space (: 💖 

@LoveMyMoonflowers

*hugs back* thank you ni . It took well of courage to create one . I am no longer keeping quite and hiding my feeling . I am trying to learn to express them . That's one of the reason I am on break from listening 

@LittleSunshine2036

awwe :’) 💜 i’m proud of you for that buddy *hugs tighttttt if okay* 💜 tbh i think it can be hard to reach out :’) to talk about how we feel/ what’s going on in our worlds 💜 it’s hard. and it takes courage 💜 i’m proud of you friend. 

@LoveMyMoonflowers 

I am proud of me too . Life has been too fast that I feel there is a lot process which I haven't.  People are leaving me and I want to cherish every moment I get to with the ones that are still here with me because I am scared that they will go too . It is getting harder and my questions and pain are just increasing 

@LittleSunshine2036

*hugs tight if okay* 💜 i hear you friend 😞💜 is there anything i can do to help or maybe ease all the pain in some way? 💜

@LoveMyMoonflowers*hugs back* these hugs are my home 💗 I truly feel belonged when someone hugs me . I wish there was someone who could hug me forever and ever . Thanks ni . Only your presence here at the moment lightens my heart 💗

*keeps hugging friendo* 💖

A Second Option 

Why am I always a second option? I feel like people only remember me when they have no one . Trust me I love being there for others but why is that when I need people I am always alone . I feel like they only want me because there is no there for the moment . 

I am invisible.  Only visible when people need my help . I understand that I need to be positive but really is being a positive person means I have no right to express the negative feeling which are growing inside me ? Why only me ? Not like I would like if someone else become a second option because of me , but still . Why me ? Was my birth decided the fate that I'll have no one at the end of the day.  All alone , with a fake smile . 

Wish life could answer questions I have in my head but she won't.  Because she is always quiet . Only he will answer me . Only knows the answer expect her . And I am scared of him . He is death how will he answer me ? By killing me and taking me to a dimension where all my pain will be gone . I ..... want it gone . 

I want my answerrrr . Pls... pls answer 

@LittleSunshine2036

Hey dear sunshine, I can understand that feeling , I still face the same thing , evryday it feels like my life is overwhelming. You're not in this alone , I'm here for you. *hugs youuu*

you can talk to me anytime you want

love you lots

@miraculousOasis6402

Thank you ♡

@LittleSunshine2036

Dear Diary , 

My today's paper was not good and my watch got lost . The same one that meant a world to me . I feel like a child who lost his ball . I cried a lot . How could I be so careless ? I feel like the worst . And also I know people will think that why is this stupid girl crying for a stupid worthless watch but you know why .

The watch was my first gift from my mother . Never in years she bought me such gift and I  feel so stupid for losing it . She said that it's okay but I can't forgive myself . 

The urge to do something bad is increasing . I can't cry infront of her . But I need someone to hold me . Comfort me . But at the moment I have no one . So please let me cry and cry and maybe.... hurt myself