@ThornyNini
July 12th,2016Β
Well my family isn't perfect and can never be okay,we are *** up .
My dad got married to another wife had has 7 kids who is is very proud of, while my mom had 5 , on certain occasion he'd beat her up,and leave her really bruised up ,I can't count how many times he did so,but I was there to console her ,on the 12 of July ,2016 he came home asked us to pack up,by us I meant my siblings he was actually taking us away.......,but I didn't want to leave my mom I was so close to her,guess that was how he started hating me,later my mom found out she was pregnant but I overheard my dad saying he didn't want the baby that he didn't care what happened to the baby , after many tries my siblings got to know ,but they didn't even come back tragic,my dad left home we never heard from my siblings anymore,my mom wasn't strong to work much and she had these pregnancies complications ,she didn't have enough blood and stuff before but she kept on pushing to care for me , she's a wonderful person, back to my siblings I missed them so much,I couldn't live without them,We slept in the same room till I was about 8 years that's when they left, I thought maybe it was just a sily joke,they wouldn't live me right we were inseparable like no matter the age difference we had,we did fun things together,we wore matching clothes for everything,we went out together like you could never see any of us without each other,so I waited for some to tell me they were coming back but no one did ,he took them to live with my aunt ,( I hated her cause she was always supporting my dad despite everything he did )I had so much to learn,I learnt how to do stuff on my own,I went to school alone and apparently they changed school so we never met,it was just me ,my mom,my little unborn baby brother at that time with my dad but he was barely there so I looked up to my mom, I always tried to make her laugh,yeah I just wanted to see her happy,I wanted her to know that I was here for her, somebody cared.some times I went to school and I ended up crying in the bathroom cause I missed them so much,while sometimes I cried on the road I couldn't let her see me sad,I always pretended like I was okay, you know I tried smiling around her so she doesn't worry too much for me cause she was pregnant,I didn't wanna stress her out,I didn't hear from them they never called ,they were living life while I was suck everyday crying wondering why they left and stuff like that.
When it was finally time on the 8th,she gave birth to this little boy,and they never came back to even see our brother,many birthdays passed and I didn't get a single thing from them not even birthday card πππππ,you know when ever I saw some siblings together I just zoned out.......,*time skip about 6years later they came back,but I wasn't me anymore,I didn't even know who I was anymore,I developed lots of strange habits which included the fact I couldn't talk to people,because when they left it my world was broken,I could neither express myself cause I felt like i wasn't worth it) and it still bothers me up to now . It's pathetic,I know.
When they came home I couldn't talk to them, it felt so weird....,and I didn't want to talk to them because when I did I'd always get judged or sometimes bluntly ignored......, and that was when she started treating me poorly,like she was a totally different person,I don't know if she did it to please my dad or what but I still don't understand why?
And then at moment like this I go back in time to those moments when everyone wasn't left,how I consoled how,I made her feel special but now when everyone treats me badly she doesn't even care , she doesn't wanna know how I feel instead she add to the pain,she criticizes me more often than I can remember,if I accidentally break a plate when doing the dishes,and I apologize severally she doesn't care all she goes about saying is that my siblings are better than me,how everyone was right to leave that I don't deserve anything......,then there was one time by phone went down I couldn't find my charger,and it was really late I was home alone I got scared thought something bad was gonna happen to her ,so I went out and saw she was already at the gate and she kept on telling me stuff.......and she didn't even let me explain,she was like if I talked to her she would kill me....,so I kept quiet yet it wasn't enough ,she kept on Saying how stupid I was and she kept blaming me like it wasn't my fault my phone died,it wasn't my fault I couldn't find the charger quickly,well it's kind of my fault for been care less.
And my dad let's not get started on that,he makes me feel worthless....tbh...
