I’m too obsessed

I got this obsession

I cannot control it, nor who it is

But I obsess

I cling on, and others I let go

They are my one, and it’s always my partner

For once they’re glued instead of bored

So I know it’s true love

But then he drives

And I get scared he may crash and burn

Or then he drinks

And I panic that he may be poisoned and choke on vomit 

Or then he says call in a bit

And I pace thinking he may be in trouble

But once I’m by his side

Or in his bed

Or him inside of me

I feel free, cause he’s by me and we’re safe

I want to stare at his face and just smile

And that’s super creepy, I know I know

I’m fixated

He is my only

For him I will not speak to another soul

For him I will change who I am for who he wants me to be

For him I will do what he wishes of me to do

Cause his company is the only thing I care for

Cause his approval is all I pray for

Cause his satisfaction is it what I feel to give

But he’s not like anyone else

He loves me when I speak, and concerned when I’m silent

He doesn’t make me feel bad for what I love

He finds me funny

He actually loves me

He is my fixation

My heart sinks when he leaves

And I cry when I can’t be next to him

My mind stirs when he’s out

To wish I can be shrunken and placed within his pocket

I will never have to leave his side

And I won’t have to worry if he may die

He will be by me, and I’ll be by him

I know I know

It’s not healthy for him to be my Earth

As I am the moon

I will always be his one, and I know not to fear of another

But the danger of the world taking him from me

The selfishness to want him and only him

To be greedy and want all of his attention

And he is it what I want

I am highly dependent on my one

He says he likes it that I’m crazy and obsessed 

But I don’t think he knows the full mess

For it has been just a bit over a month

And I know after he’s taken me at 17

He will forever be my one

The one I marry

The only I’ll give myself to

The only I shall wake up beside

The only I will care about

The only I will obsess over

The only I will ever need

The only I will love with all my life

As for him, I have regrets of everyone I said I love you before

I’m too fixated, he said wait twenty minutes

And I’m sitting here spilling my guts to the internet 

All because I felt compelled to distract

To distract myself for what to come

If today will be our last, and his last breath