Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

@MusicCandy @SadMe70 A place to communicate

SadMe70 November 10th, 2016

@MusicCandy Hello! I have to get ready for work but will post more later!

713
MusicCandy December 30th, 2018

Hello, I am glad you are finally feeling better- it took me 3 weeks too. That was good for you to be able to enjoy the time with your sisters and your mom and family. I used to drink drambuie in my younger party wild nights - its good, - at least that's how I remember it. Did I read it right that your mom anfd one sister are in Korea with your son/wife? Is that for the wedding - are you going at all? I was a little confused about that.

We got through the evening at the home just fine with 13 family there, mostly for Mom. she is pretty compliant now that her breathing is very O2 dependent. Plus, she likes being waiting on by the nurses. She didn't complain and it was an OK time - still glad when it was over. The best part was watching Rachael open her gifts - she gets se excited over any little thing. Her aunt gave her cash and she was all smiles then-Mc donalds and Taco Bell and a haircut.

I know what your mom was expecting with Lessons and Carols. We have that at our church too, but I more enjoyed listening on the radio -Cambridge as you said-and tidying up the kitchen at the same time. Our church is straight from the book with that service, and some people love it- some hate it. Fiance and me and Rachael went to the 11pm Methodist Eve service at the church we can walk up the hill to from my house. We only go there for the special services bc they make it special.It was bells, communion, choirs and candlelight - just beautiful and for me the best part of Christmas.

Work was not too bad, and now I'm back. The manager did not put enough staff on to cover everything for New Years, and she is out of town, so i'm halping a cowarker with Sun, Mon Tues - after 3 PM for CT. I have to juggle Rachael with her Dad but I'm sure it will work out. That extra money can go towards the new roof I had to put on last week. Thr house is next to a wetland and it stays damp so there was damaged wood, mold and algae problems. O well, had to do it anyway.

As for the weight issue, i really don't know. One scale says I did lose the 3-4 lbs and another says I am the same weight as before- no change. I felt kind of upset about not knowing, but i had to just let that feeling go. I did wear a dress that was normally tight to my moms and it fit better, so maybe .. something. work is so hard to not ear carbs - being up all night throws everything off. i am keeping up with my no wine 3 days - almost. I cheated with one glass the other evening trying to get some sleep before work and they were banging on the roof, and it ws raining and I wanted comfort. But I do plan to do my best to keep up that limit. My check up is in Jan and i would so love to see better labs. Don't feel depressed over the weight if you can help it - just remember feeling bad won't help anything. Try to let it go and focus on one goal. I don't do the weight loss challenges either - mostly bc they post the names and pictures on the bulllitin board - i don't want that. I do keep my exercise going, and I encourage you to just start- you will feel better.

I may get back ere in the next 3 days back and forth from work - yo hve a quiet and serene start to the New Year. That's what we need right? PEACE and QUIET.

SadMe70 OP January 1st, 2019

Happy New Year! Thanks for all your encouragement and support! Here's to us in 2019!

MusicCandy January 2nd, 2019

HEAR HEAR! A toast to our friendship. I'm back at work tonight, eating th beans and greens I fixed for good luck wow- they turned out delicious. Have a good start at school tomorrow.

SadMe70 OP January 5th, 2019

Just a quick note in the middle of the night! My son and his wife have been in Korea for a few weeks, and tonight they had their second wedding ceremony. My mom and sister are there (I can't remember if I answered your question about that) and my older son. My son streamed part of the ceremony from his phone from one side of the room, and someone on her mom's phone streamed from the other side. Wow, was it a big expensive production! Very nice and very pretty. I am going to bed now!

MusicCandy January 5th, 2019

I am so glad you got to see some of the ceremony - from what I have seen they are quite a big deal. It seems like a status symbol for their culture to throw a big wedding with showy outfits and like you said- expensive decor and food. I hope everything works out for them to return together. We all just want our children to be happy and fulfilled. My daughter's trip to NY with her BGF and boyfriend went fine. They did some sightseeeing but were up in their room during the NYEve bash on the street- watching the screens like everyone else, Just glad they had a safe trip.

Nice notes - from us on the Healthy Living forum. Polite Ocean does a lot for everyone to stay upbeat, I am keeping up my no wine 3 days plan and I am fairly sure I'm down at least the 3 lbs. I am eating more fiber and since my check up is late Jan. I want to be more vigilant every day to see if it helps my cholestrol .I heard another segment on heart health on the" People's Pharmacy "on NPR this morning and I want to read that online later. I like their natural approach but it is more complimentary - not just alternative. They interview the best and latest experts and review articles in any field with different topics. It is worth checking out on any concerns you may have .Good website.

How is your exercise / meal plans going ? If you are feeling down, take heart and don't give up. I tried all year to lose just ONE lb and keep it off - and what helped me was to decide thatI was going to eat a low carb diet and cut back the wine( I don't even know if that helped the weight - but I know I needed to anyway) and exercise every day - even if it is just a 30 min. walk. And laugh a little every day. My fiance makes sure I do that with his antics so I don't have to even try.laugh

SadMe70 OP January 6th, 2019

Hello! I am glad to hear your daughter had a good trip to NY. Are things going more smoothly with her bf? Any talk of a wedding?

I am getting myself slowly back together. I ate fairly well this week, no thanks to the school! Two days back, and 2 days with junk already. No word on the weight loss challenge. I was hoping they would launch that right away and stop having so much junk around. I didn't do much exercise this week, but will start back to that on Monday.

I have a new person starting to milk my goats, but she's having a really hard time learning since my goats are behaving badly so I don't know if that will last. Plus I am getting back a goat that I gave away last year and that is going to cause me all sorts of short and long term problems. But for now, I should be able to get to the Y two mornings a week, so that is one day to swim and one of weights with my trainer. I will start back to yoga on Tuesday, which I have missed 3 weeks in a row, and will try to make myself go to the Y Fridays after work. As long as I don't keep getting sick and I continue to have support with the goats, I should lose the holiday weight and then I can go back to my battle with trying to go lower!

Good for you on keeping up with your wine plan! I am also going to try to go back to wine only on weekend nights. I am glad you are down your 3 pounds! Keep up the fiber too! I have been doing that for almost a year since my stomach problems, and it helps me! I have never listened to People's Pharmacy. I do try to eat as much unprocessed food as I can, especially to avoid extra salt and sugar. I will take a look at their website.

Here's to us in the new year! May we stay well, and stick with all our healthy plans!

1 reply
MusicCandy January 11th, 2019

@SadMe70

Goats! what cha gonna do? I never had to manage animals like that , it much be a job not everyone can do. I hope it works out with your helper so you can have more time to take care of yourself. I encourage you on your exercise plan - I can't say how I'd handle treats at work; I'm not good at that either. I have managed to keep off the 3-4 lbs and started adding more fiber wth the low carb diet that i'm committed to. However, it didn't seem to help with my colonoscopy today - they couldnt get tthrough it ; I wasn't cleaned out enough - imagine that! I had the first morning appt, and I started the prep late in the afternoon. The Dr. said I should have started earlier; and he did find a polyp which they removed but couldn't save - it was " lost in the stool" -eee ww. So, I have to have another one in 6 months with better prep. I really want to focus on the fiber from now until then , to improve the diverticulitis polyps that may still be there, and to make sure I am able to get all cleaned out. The procedure really wasn't that bad though - better than the one I had 11 years ago.

Calling for more snow this week-end which I'm not looking forward to - i hate trying to frive in it or having to get to work. AND My mom along with her nurses at the Home decided to not have any more medical procedures done , no more hospital visits and look into hospice. She has advanced lung disease that therer is no cure for, but she could live a long- or a short time with - depending on how it progresses, So now I have to take care of some legal stuff for her, and interview 3 different hospice companies and decide on one. They provide care at the home so she doesn't have to go anywhere else - but it should be more hands on care for her. Now soneone else can listen to her "woe is me" talk nonstop. There was a meeting and the care team discussed it with her and she was crying, and they were all crying- but I was not crying. I sort of explained later to oine of them that I am the oldest and I have to be strong for the family, yada- yada. It seems like a plausible story. but I cried all my young and most of my adult life from the abuse from her - so my tears are all spent. she has a good life with people taking care of her every whim,;the O2 helps her breathe, and she gets pain medication when she wants it - no tears from me.

No ring yet for daughter, I don't know about that. It may be too soon from their last crisis, but at least they are getting along. His grandmother had a serious stroke and not doing well either. sometimes other family matterrs can ease the tension, and maybe later he will make it official. I hoipe your son and DIL are making out OK and they can came home together. You have a relaxing week-end. I'll be at work, as usual.

load more
SadMe70 OP January 15th, 2019

My son is safely home from Korea. My husband went to get him Sunday night at 10:30 from BWI and they drove home in the snowstorm while I stayed home and worried. They got all the way here and then got his van stuck in a ditch on our driveway. So today's agenda includes digging and a tractor. Once we get the van up the driveway, we have to get my son's car across the snowy mudbog of a yard from where I parked it out of the way, onto the driveway. He already missed class yesterday, but luckily has no classes today.

Sorry to hear your colonoscopy didn't go entirely to plan and that you have to have another so soon! I was bummed enough to hear that I have to have one in 5 years instead of 10 since I had a pre-cancerous polyp. They also found diverticulosis, another reason why my doctor wanted me to increase my fiber. So we have something else in common! Yay us! cheeky

Good luck with the hospice search. We had just set that up for Dad and he died the day we were going to get him home from rehab. It still bothers my mom that he died in a facility instead of at home, but honestly there was a brutal cold wind following a snowstorm, and the transport would have been really hard on him. I hope having that care right there for your mom will take a lot of burden from you. I understand about the not crying. Your story is so much like my husband. His mom emotionally abused him so much all her life, that when she declined, he did not cry as she did all her woe-is-me in between bursts of nasty meanness.

I did well with exercise this past week, my first week back to exercising. This weekend I did no exercise, and ate way too much. I have also been drinking too much alcohol. I did go to the Y yesterday for a little cardio. If we get the van unstuck early enough, I plan to go to the park for a walk and some snowy photos. My swim at the Y tomorrow morning will not happen unless we get a school delay, because my Wed milker lady cannot come. I have been eating good meals, and certainly less treats than over the holidays, but still too many treats, so no weight loss yet. I am at least slowly getting back to my good habits.

I hope you are safe and well in the snow!

SadMe70 OP January 20th, 2019

Brief update. Nothing much new. I did not get in all my exercise this week though. I missed yoga on Tuesday because of snow, missed my swimming on Wednesday because my milker could not come. On Friday I packed a bag for the Y for after work, then switched cars with my son (he was going to PA to get his dog back from my mom and I wanted him to have my four wheel drive car since it had snowed there again on Thurs) and fogot to get my bag. We did go walk at the park yesterday. Tomorrow I am off and have an appointment with a dentist on the west end of Fredericksburg to get my new night mouth guard. It is only 30 more minutes from there to Lake Anna State Park, where I've never been, so I am planning to go walk there after my appointment. It is supposed to be about 24 degrees so I will bundle up!

My meals have been good, treats not too bad. I drank a lot in the past week because I've had two long weekends in a row and did not have to get up early as many days. My son brought me soju from Korea, a popular alcoholic drink there that I tasted when her family brought some here in April. I quite like it! The brand he got comes in little 200 ml boxes that look just like juice boxes! He brought me a flat of mommy's little juice boxes. I shared some with him but am hoarding the rest for myself!!

I hope you are well!

1 reply
MusicCandy January 21st, 2019

Hello, @SadMe70

A week has gone by and I hardly can find words. 3 days after my Mom decided on Hospice, she "took a turn" as the nurse said. When I got there Monday, a week ago she was mostly unresponsive.For 2 days. in and out - but thankfully hospice kicked right in. She stayed at the Home in the Care Unit, but extra care and meds of course with Hospice. She rallied for 2 days and started sipping water, but then threw it up so as of Friday, nothing by mouth. My second sister came today, until now its just been me and her church friends , who are wonderful. They took turns spending the night until last night when I stayed. That sister is going back to Fayetteville tomorrow but she is now just 3 hrs. away. she is the one with severe hearing loss and menieres and other health problems. The other sister from FL is going to come "when she can stay" which is just as well. Funeral and Memorial and all that will take a few days. Same for my sister in VT, except she is snowed under, several feet of snow and 35 below zero. I hope it clears up soon b/c I really think its just a few days. The Hospice nurses stay all night when they think she has 24 to 48 hrs. left. We packed up most of her regular room/ apt. and have had time to make most of the arrangements, which is a blessing. I had a good gut wrenching cry last week, and now I'm pretty settled. I have no bad feelings left at all - she kept trying to tell me "I'm sorry". I don't know if it was just the "trouble" of watching her, or maybe something deeper. I don't know and it doesn't matter. Everyone here, all her church friends say how much a friend she is and how much she helped them through tough times.. including the doctor who has seen her every Friday for 6 years. The residents and staff are like family, and they have shed tears too. They are taking excellent tender care , and her church friends are helping me.To make it even harder, my daughter's boyfriend's grandma passed away yesterday - she was a grandma to her too. I'll update you when I can - a million details every day. Thank you for your prayers and love.

load more
SadMe70 OP January 22nd, 2019

Oh this was a sad post to see. I am sorry for what you are going through. I hope that your sisters can spend whatever time they want with her. I'm glad you are feeling settled. I know your relationship with her is rough, but yet she's your mother so you care. It's a tough place to be. I hope that it helps you to hear from others some good things she has done, and that you know she is being well taken care of. I will pray more for your family, my friend.

1 reply
MusicCandy January 22nd, 2019

@SadMe70

Thank you, it was a comfort to see your message. My 3rd sister just arrived after driving 12 hrs. and she is doing OK. My baby sister in VT won't make it , but I am going to call her this evening and let her hear her voice. I think this will be it. I'll be back, and thank you for your prayers.

load more
SadMe70 OP January 24th, 2019

Thinking about you my friend. heart